Joe Lansdale: Mucho Mojo

“You see, man,” Leonard said, “Hiram was lying. He understood the reasons Fitzgerald was the way he was too well to be operating by them himself. It had been Fitzgerald who had believed in what he was doing; he was the one with the psychotic delusions that he was doing God’s work as given him to do by his daddy. But you can’t let Fitzgerald off the hook either. He made a choice. And there was something else, man. He had those porno mags same as Hiram, and the sex with the kids, they can say that was part of the pattern, but it all sounds like a power trip to me, plain and simple. But let’s give Fitzgerald a little room and say it isn’t all his fault. Not much room, but enough to turn around in, and then let’s go on to Hiram.

“Hiram, he got a bad break for a kid too, but hell, that wasn’t his environment. He’d got over it in time, dealt with it, told eventually, he’d wanted to. But he liked the killing from the start, was born with a wire twisted and a piston loose. I bet he was doing them animals in before he ever got butt-fucked and in on that murder. With Hiram, it was like dropping ole Br’er Rabbit in the briar patch. He was born and bred for it, same as some dogs come out bad and others come out good, and they come from the same stock. MeMaw was good people, but that didn’t mean the genes didn’t come together in Hiram crooked somewhere. Got the wrong combination.”

“Then in a way,” I said, “that means he couldn’t help it.”

“Bad dogs can’t help but bite either. I’ve seen ’em born vicious and just get worse as they got older, no matter how good you treated ’em. They can’t help it, but I couldn’t help putting a bullet through their heads either. You don’t bite me, or try to bite me but once… . Shit, Hap, some things just are. Hiram was a predator from birth, and he enjoyed feeding Fitzgerald’s religious frenzy, so in turn he could feed his own needs. Think about what they found in Tyler.”

When Hiram’s home was checked into, the police in Tyler found souvenirs, more souvenirs than could have come from those dead boys under the Hampstead place. It looked as if once a year in LaBorde hadn’t been enough for Hiram. In time, if he talked more, the Tyler police felt certain they’d clear up a lot of local cases involving missing children.

“No telling how many kids Hiram’s nailed,” Leonard said. “Here, in Tyler, on his route. He had the perfect job for his little hobby. And he’d kept right on doing it until he was stopped or the grave got him.”

“I know,” I said. “I guess there’s a part of me thinks somewhere along the line everyone could have been saved. Maybe not come out perfect, but not come out a monster either.”

“Hap, my man, there is evil in the world. True evil. It doesn’t twirl its mustache and it doesn’t wear black and it doesn’t slink and it doesn’t come in any one color or sex. Sometimes evil comes from good places, like MeMaw, and sometimes it can wear all kinds of good faces and talk good as anyone can talk, but it’s just a face and it’s just talk. Evil’s real, man. Same as good.”

“And what about T.J.? How does he fit into your theory?”

“I don’t care if he fits at all, Hap. Now shut up and fish.”

I baited my hook and did just that, but I never could get my mind right. I kept thinking about it all, wondering if the kid we’d saved would have a chance now, or if he’d just go right back to the street. I wondered if at this very moment he might be sticking a shot of horse into his arm.

We didn’t catch any fish. Leonard was pissed. His mouth was set for a finny friend. We stopped off at Kroger’s on the way home and went in there to buy a fish to fry. They were all out. We got some fish sticks and took them home and baked them in the oven.

Later that month, on a cool night with the sky black and the stars bright, I moved away from Uncle Chester’s. The work on the house was completed, except for painting, and Leonard decided to live there at least until spring. At that time, I was supposed to move back and help paint the place, then he’d put it up for sale.

But for me, for now, I wanted away from there and the remains of the drug house next door, MeMaw’s house, the woods out back, and the Hampstead place. I felt it all closing in on me at night, as if the houses, the remains of the drug house, were living things that could reach out and touch me.

I suppose, believing that way in some primitive part of my mind, I should have believed Uncle Chester’s bottle tree could protect me, but it had become easier to believe the evil than the good.

Me and Leonard had a big dinner that night, and after dinner I shook hands with him, put my stuff in the back of the pickup, and we stood around outside and listened to the wind in the bottle tree. It was a cool wind. It was an agreeable night.

“You be true, Hap.”

“Don’t be surprised you don’t hear from me for a week,” I said.

“All right.”

“Don’t be surprised you hear from me tomorrow.”

He smiled at me. “Drive careful, man.”

I hugged him and drove away from there, started home, but didn’t make it. I went out Highway 7 instead. I drove on out to the scenic overlook and went up there and parked. I got out and lay on the hood of the truck with my back to the windshield and looked at the sky. It was a beautiful night and the stars were as clear and bright as a young girl’s eyes. Beautiful like that time Florida and I had come up here. It was hard remembering exactly who I had been then. I felt older now and the world seemed sadder, and it was as if everything I had ever learned was ultimately pointless. When I had lain here with Florida beside me that night, not so long ago – but in another way, a million years past – she told me we could see Forever. And we could. But Forever then was a wonderful place, full of mystery and hope and eternity.

Tonight, I could still see Forever, but Forever was nothing to see.