Amanda Stevens - The Dollmaker

“Are you okay?” Dave asked with a frown.

“I guess I’m just surprised to see you.”

“Are you sure that’s all it is?”

“Yes, of course.” She drew a long breath. “What do you want?”

He took a step toward her, his eyes catching the moonlight. “I need to talk to you.”

“Why? I think you pretty much told me everything I needed to know on Tuesday, and I’m tired tonight. I want to get inside.”

“I owe you an apology.”

Claire had moved to the front door, keys in hand, but now she stood motionless. “You didn’t need to come all the way to New Orleans for that. We both said things we shouldn’t have.”

“I’m not talking about our conversation the other day, although you’re right. I do regret the way things ended.” He hesitated. “I came to tell you that I’m sorry for what I did seven years ago. I’m sorry about everything.”

Claire felt something deep inside give way, but she clung to the last vestiges of her strength. It had been a long day. She was tired, she was scared and she was in no frame of mind to have an emotional conversation with her ex-husband. “So what is this? Step five or nine? I forget.”

She saw him flinch. “I’m just trying to do what’s right these days. I know an apology doesn’t make up for what I did, but I needed to say it anyway.”

She turned, a taste like metal in her mouth as her anger flared. “And it’s always about what you need, isn’t it? Did it ever once occur to you that maybe I don’t want to hear your apology? Maybe what I need is just to leave things alone. Forget it ever happened.”

“But have you forgotten? I know I haven’t. Even after all this time, it kills me that I cheated on you. And I still don’t even know why I did it.”

“You know, you’re right, Dave. I did need to hear that. I feel so much better now.”

“Claire…”

She sighed, letting the anger slip out of her. “You may find this hard to believe, but I have more on my mind these days than your betrayal. Go home, Dave. Go home and leave me alone, because nothing you say can change what happened.”

“Just let me come in for a minute. Please, Claire.” He held his hands out in supplication. “I don’t expect one apology to change how you feel about me, but at least hear me out. If you want me to help you find that doll, we need to clear the air about some things. It’s important.”

Her gaze lifted. “You’ve changed your mind about helping me?”

“Let’s go inside and we’ll talk about it.”

His face was still in shadows. Claire couldn’t see his expression, but something in his voice made her shiver. “All I want to know is if you believe me.”

“Yes,” he said quietly. “I believe you saw a doll that looks like Ruby. What it means, I have no idea. But I do believe you. Can I come inside so that we can talk?”

She gave a reluctant nod even as she tried to quell the rush of relief inside her. She opened the door and reached inside to flip the light switch. But when she glanced back, he was still standing in the same spot, staring out at the street.

“What’s wrong? I thought you wanted to come in.”

“I do. But something just struck me.”

“What?”

“I was just standing here thinking about the way I used to drive by all the time, hoping to catch a glimpse of you.”

Claire’s chest tightened. “You mean when my grandmother lived here?”

He hesitated. “Yeah.”

“That was a long time ago.”

“Kind of seemed like yesterday until I drove through the old neighborhood on my way over here. That little burger joint where you used to work on weekends is a quick mart now.”

“I know. It has been for years.”

“I guess I hadn’t noticed.” He turned with a shrug. “Anyway, it made me think of the first time I ever stopped in there. Do you remember?”

“Of course I remember. You were in one of your moods. You looked as if you were ready to kill somebody when you came in the door.”

“And then there you were, smiling at me. I couldn’t take my eyes off you. I’d known you most of my life, but something just clicked in my head that day. It was like I was seeing you for the first time. It was only a moment, over in a heartbeat. But that’s when I knew.”

A car pulled into the drive next door, the headlights reflecting in Dave’s eyes as he stared down at Claire. She tried to look away, but couldn’t.

“Ever since you left my place the other day, I’ve been trying to think of the exact instant when things went so wrong for us. If there was a moment when it started, there had to be a moment when it ended. But I didn’t see it. It passed by and I didn’t even notice.”

“Because you weren’t looking,” Claire said softly. She hugged her arms around her middle. “It wasn’t just a moment, it was a lot of them. It was your job and the drinking. The dark moods. There was a part of your life, a part of yourself, that you couldn’t or wouldn’t share with me. I wanted to understand, but you shut me out, and sometimes you made me feel as if I were trespassing on something private. Something that wasn’t any of my business. There were times, especially toward the end, when I felt like an outsider in my own marriage.”

“Why didn’t you tell me you felt that way?”

“I did tell you. You just weren’t listening. And anyway, it really doesn’t matter anymore.”

“It does to me.”

Claire swallowed. “That’s because you’re still living in the past. But the rest of us have moved on.” She walked quickly into the house.

A moment later, she heard the door close behind him as he followed her inside. “You’ve moved on, huh. Is that why you want me to help you find a doll that looks like Ruby?”

“That’s different. The doll exists, whether you believe me or not. It’s not a smokescreen or my imagination or anything else. The doll is real and so is this.” She removed the photograph from her purse and handed it to him.

He glanced up with a puzzled frown.

“I found it tonight as I was leaving work. Someone put it in a box and left it outside the door.” Claire nodded toward the picture. “Turn it over and read the back.”

He flipped it over, and as he read the inscription aloud, Claire shuddered. “To Mama.”

“Ruby didn’t write that,” she said. “I’m pretty sure it’s the same photograph that was stolen from here a few nights ago, and it didn’t have anything written on the back then.”

“Someone broke in here?”

“I think Mama left a window open. It was one night last week when we had one of those sudden thunderstorms. I was already in bed and I heard glass breaking. When I came downstairs, I saw that a vase had fallen in the sunroom and shattered on the floor. The window was open. I assumed the curtain had swept it off the table. Then I realized a picture of Ruby was missing from the same table.”

“Why didn’t you tell me about this before?”

“You didn’t believe me about the doll….” She shrugged and trailed off.

“Did you tell anyone?”

“I didn’t know who to tell. I didn’t want to worry Mama, and besides, I wasn’t even sure that the picture was really missing then. I thought I might have forgotten that I’d put it away. And now it turns up outside the studio, on a night when I’m working alone.”

“Did you see or hear anything unusual tonight? Have you noticed anyone suspicious hanging around the studio or gallery in the past few days?”

“A woman came in last Saturday. I thought she was part of a group that toured the studio that afternoon, but she didn’t leave with everyone else. She stood in front of a display case for a long time, staring at one of my pieces. Maybe she was just trying to make up her mind, because she did eventually buy it. But there was something about her that made me uneasy. I don’t even know how to explain it. She had on thick makeup that made her look…I don’t know…unnatural somehow. Now that I think back about it, I can’t help wondering if she was deliberately trying to conceal her real identity. But I guess that sounds a little paranoid. Or maybe just plain crazy.”