Randy White - Black Widow

“Tough, you mean.”

“Yeah, tough. But also… well, she’s different-” Shay lowered her voice. “When it comes to men, I mean. I don’t know how Elliot put up with it for as long as he did. I don’t know if I told you, but Elliot and I were close friends.”

I said, “Were?”

“It’s a long story. Beryl has a problem with jealousy. The woman’s like a sister, Doc, but you’re family, too, which is the only reason I’m telling you this-”

I interrupted, “Let’s talk in the morning, okay?” as Beryl came through the door, still toweling her hair, but already talking, saying, “That’s an amazing shower. It’s like washing in a thunderstorm. It is rainwater, isn’t it? Nothing else leaves your hair so soft-” She stopped, seeing I was on the phone.

I held up a finger-Done in a minute-as Shay whispered, “My God, she’s there. Why didn’t you tell me?”

I said, “Glad to hear you’re better. I’ll give you a call in the morning.”

“Jesus, just you and Beryl alone?” Shay was still whispering, but talking fast. “Doc, listen to me. If she hasn’t done it already, she’ll try to get you into bed. It’s what Beryl does after breaking up with a guy. Don’t do it. Trust me-there’s a reason. I’ll tell you later. When she’s like this, she’ll say anything to get what she wants.”

Looking into Beryl’s blue-jean eyes as she walked toward me, the room suddenly warmer, I said into the phone, “Follow the doctor’s orders, that’s good advice.”

I hung up.

Beryl said, “That was Shay-shay? I told you she’d call. Did she warn you to stay away from me?”

The woman continued drying her hair, then gave her head a shake, creating a loose amber curtain that framed her face.

“Shay said you two are like sisters. And she told me what happened when you were thirteen. I hope that’s okay.”

“Hmm… Interesting.”

“You said I should ask.”

“That’s right. I did.” Beryl turned a tan shoulder to me, towel knotted above her breasts, inner thigh visible as she stepped toward an aquarium, skin whiter where shadows angled upward. “Did she tell you all the nasty details?”

“She said you never discuss the details. I didn’t ask, but she said it, anyway. Shay had an abusive father-I met the guy. He was about as nasty as they come. She was explaining that you two had a lot in common. It helped me understand why you want to return to Saint Arc.”

“I wish she’d given me time to tell you myself.”

I was tempted to tell Beryl she’d had ample opportunity. Instead, I said, “Don’t blame Shay. I pressed for information.”

“Do you think I’m some kind of freak now? A lot of people do. That I’m damaged goods, some kind of psychological cripple. Rescued by Boy Scouts, so I must be some helpless twit. That’s what they think. Men, especially. But some women, too.”

I said, “You’re talking about Shay.”

Beryl said, “Maybe.” She was staring at the venomous sea jellies that oscillated in the aquarium’s cool light. They were translucent prisms, living wafers of light. “We are like sisters in some ways. Territorial. Shay’s always had a thing for you. A physical thing, so she’d be defensive.” Beryl turned to me, eyes hoping for a reaction.

“If she told you that, she was kidding.”

“You didn’t know? No… I can see you didn’t. Shay says you’re sort of dense that way. When we first met, she had a bad case of Doc Ford- tried all the little tricks, but you never took the bait. Michael’s still jealous as hell of you. Funny-I didn’t believe her when she told me you never figured out that she was interested.”

“Maybe she had a crush. I would’ve noticed if it was anything serious.”

“It was a lot more than a crush. That’s why she asked my father to give her away at the wedding, not you. One of the reasons. She said it’d be too strange. You know, because she still has sexual feelings for you.”

Apparently there were many reasons.

“Shay will say anything to make sure that you and I… that we don’t become more than friends.”

I said, “Anything?” In my mind, I was replaying Shay’s warning. She’ll say anything to get what she wants.

“Well, almost anything. I love her. She’s one hard-ass girl. But she won’t be happy if she finds out what we did tonight.”

I said, “Why? We didn’t do anything wrong. You told me about Saint Arc. I made notes. We looked up some things on the Internet. Nothing wrong with that.”

“You know what I mean. It was innocent, but she’d still be jealous.”

I knew what she meant.

We’d been out in my skiff. No wind tonight, and the bay was a bio-luminescent soup, bright as emerald paint when disturbed. Beryl had stripped to bra and panties and jumped overboard-“Like jumping into a cloud of fireflies!” she told me when she surfaced. “A billion stars explode. You’ve got to try it.”

That’s why she was showering when Shay called. That’s why I was wearing nothing but running shorts and sandals.

Beryl touched a finger to the aquarium, tracing the path of a sea jelly as it descended. “I shouldn’t talk that way about Shay. You two are close. But she should be more understanding about your feelings and mine. After two years with Elliot-Mister Perfect-it’s nice to be with a guy like you.”

I said, “I’m anything but perfect. The rumors are true.”

“Are they?”

“That I’m not perfect? Yes.”

She smiled, watching the sea jellies. “It wasn’t a cut. It was a compliment. I like it here, Ford. Everything neat and orderly. It has a nice smell-sort of like living in a tree house.” She turned. “And I like you. A lot.”

I said, “You’re welcome here anytime.”

“True?”

“Yes.”

“But you’re not going to change your mind about me going to Saint Arc.”

“No.”

There was a towel next to the computer. I put it over my shoulder as I tapped the monitor, eager to change the subject. “I found this while you were outside. It’s about party drugs.”

She smiled. “I’ve heard of them.” Said it as if I was the naive one, not her.

“Well, maybe there’s one you haven’t heard of. A friend told me about an amphetamine derivative that’s popular at resorts in Jamaica.”

“The tall hippie-looking guy?”

“That’s him. Guys slip it into girls’ drinks. Or they soak marijuana in it. The medical abbreviation is MDA-methylenedioxyamphetamine. It could explain your behavior that night.”

“They drugged us? I kind of suspected it. More than just the grass, I mean.” Beryl crossed the room and put her hand on my bicep, pivoting behind me so she could see the screen. I could feel the heat of her fingertips. I watched her breathing change as she read, chest moving beneath the towel.

“Unlike most stimulants, MDA does not increase motor activity. It suppresses it in a remarkable way. Inhibitions normally present in group situations are reduced(although it can have an opposite effect on a small percentage of users, causing paranoia).

“In group MDA experiences, people typically want to explore mutual touching and the pleasures of physical closeness. Even a group of strangers may feel very loving toward one another. They describe a ‘warm glow’ that radiates gradually into the penis or clitoris, but the experience is not always explicitly sexual because MDA tends to decrease the desire for orgasm.

"Some subjects, however, feel it heightens the sexual experience because pleasurablesensations do not end abruptly with orgasm…”

After several seconds, Beryl said, “My God, that describes exactly the way I felt. Sort of dreamy and unreal. I loved everybody. And the part about people in groups, the way they behave…” She hesitated. “Did you tell Shay about this?”