Diane Capri - Don't Know Jack

“How can I help you?” Husky timbre. Polite. Maybe a real human heart beating inside the frightening package.

Gaspar flashed his badge. “We need to see the contents of P.O. Box 4719.”

Without rancor, “Got a warrant?”

“We can get one. Do we need to?”

The dude didn’t move.

“Show me your ID,” Gaspar said.

The dude held up the work badge hanging from the black lanyard around his neck. Gaspar maintained eye contact, took a photo of the face and the badge with his phone, sent it, and dialed a number.

“Jenny? Carlos Gaspar here. Can you run that mug I just sent? Alfred Lane, works at Mailboxes are Yours in Crystal City. Yeah, probably twenty-seven?” Alfred nodded. “Uh, huh. Right. That’s the guy. How many? Yep. Okay. Thanks.”

He clicked off the call and dropped the phone in his pocket and said, “Alfred Lane, you’re under arrest.”

Then he started in with the Miranda warning and got as far as silent before the dude shrugged and said, “I thought all that was cleared up. Sorry. Come over here.”

A long row of mail box doors was set into the wall. The guy stopped at one of the larger sized boxes, maybe eleven inches square, mounted about mid-collection. The guy pulled a small silver key from a ring of a hundred similar keys. Opened 4719’s brass door. Inside, envelopes were stuffed tight as cryovac sausage.

“Is this all of it?” Gaspar asked.

“More in the back.”

Kim followed Alfred Lane’s shuffle through a door into a well maintained storage area. There was a clean cement floor. The space was brightly lit. The walls had been recently painted.

Lane pointed to a standard white cardboard banker’s box stacked neatly among identical boxes. The number 4719 was stenciled in black on all four sides. The box below was numbered 4720. Logical.

“Is this all of it?” Kim asked. It seemed a small amount of mail for five years.

“If there were more, it would be here.” The guy was breaking several federal laws by releasing mail without a court order. Kim wanted to arrest him on the spot.

Instead, she asked, “Take it out front for me?”

The guy bent down and grabbed 4720 and lifted it together with 4719, the proper way, with bent knees and a straight back. The exertion didn’t seem to stress him. He shuffled past her and through to the lobby. He called back, “Check the lock on that door, OK?”

“OK.” Kim wondered how 4720 was related to 4719. But she didn’t ask.

The guy put both boxes on the counter.

Gaspar said, “I’m going to need the rental information, too. You have it on your computer?”

“Should be there.” He pecked and clicked and pulled up an account page. He printed it. He pecked a few more times, located a scanned copy of the application form, which included a photo of the box’s owner, Sylvia Kent. He printed that one, too.

Gaspar found a packing crate, plopped down a ten dollar bill to pay for it, and filled it with the remaining contents of 4719.

“What about 4720?” Kim asked, holding out her hand for the key.

“Oh, right. Sorry.” The guy handed the key over and returned to do the computer work on 4720, too focused to notice Gaspar’s questioning glance, or Kim’s quick shrug in reply.

She opened mailbox 4720 and found it packed just as tight as 4719 had been. She waved Gaspar over with his crate.

“Do you know when these boxes were emptied last?” she asked.

Alfred Lane replied while continuing his computer work. “We don’t monitor the customers. They collect their mail when they want to and we store it for them until they do.”

“How many customers do you have?”

“Varies. Max is 750. Full up right now. Sometimes we have vacancies.”

“You demand the same proof of identity as the U.S. Postal Service to rent these boxes, right?”

“Required by law, we do it. Trust me, we don’t want terrorists here.”

“Can we get a copy of the list?”

“Why not?” he said. He tapped a couple of keys. The printer hummed. Gaspar took the pages and dropped them in the packing crate. He said, “Thanks, Alfred. Now help me tote these out to the car, OK?”

“No problem,” Alfred said, like he was helping paying customers, like it was all part of the service. Eager to see them go away happy. Or more likely, just go away.

Gaspar said, “I’d suggest you get those outstanding warrant problems ironed out. Otherwise, you’ll be a guest of the Feds by early next week. Know what I mean?”

“I’m on it, man.”

Kim figured what he’d be on was the next outbound bus as soon as their tail lights disappeared around the corner.

Gaspar popped the trunk open, stowed the boxes and slammed the lid.

“You all set? Anything else I can help with?” Alfred asked, hands resting in low side pockets.

Gaspar pulled out his smart phone again, and brought up the fingerprinting app. “Put your right forefinger here.”

Alfred Lane did what he was asked. No objection.

“Thanks.” Gaspar sent the print. “But don’t forget about those warrants. I’ll check on you tomorrow. Everything’s not fixed by then, they’ll send me back to pick you up, you know?”

“No problem.” Alfred Lane turned and shuffled back into the store, keys clanging on the chain hanging from his sloppy jeans.

“Warrants for what?” Kim asked, once Gaspar had the Crown Vic on the road again.

“He jumped bail in Jersey about three months ago. Twelve counts of grand larceny and aggravated battery.”

“And you just ignored that? And left him there? Are you nuts?”

“You’re so easy.” He grinned and winked. “Locals are on the way. They’ll get here before he scrams.”

She punched his shoulder with her fist because he’d had her going. She felt better, though. “Some bondsman in New Jersey will be happy, too.”

“And thereby hangs a tale,” Gaspar said.

“Why? Who was the bondsman?”

“Bernard Owens.”

“Never heard of him.”

“Me neither. Goes by Bernie, apparently. But we got a bonus. They sent me a picture along with his name.” He tossed his smart phone into her lap. “He looked a little worse than that the last time I saw him.”

Kim looked at the photo. And gasped.

She recognized the face.

Bernie Owens, New Jersey bondsman, was the rescuer of Sylvia Black.

The shorter guy on Roscoe’s videotape.

The guy who wasn’t L. Mark Newton.

Very likely the charred body in the Chevy.

Gaspar drove on and said, “And Alfred Lane, who owes Bernie Owens big bond money, just happens to be working in the very place where Sylvia’s mail hibernated for five long years. Gets better and better, doesn’t it? Go right ahead. You can call me brilliant now. Roscoe would.”

Kim punched him again, harder this time, and he laughed harder, too.

“Lucky is better than good,” she said. She fired up her phone for an internet search, and less than sixty seconds later, she said, “Guess what other business Bernie’s got going on?”

Gaspar said, “Tell me.”

“Privacy management.”

“Which is?”

“A euphemism for helping people disappear.”

“Enterprising guy. But apparently workaholism kills.”

“Tax records will confirm or deny, but I’m betting Bernie owns the mailbox place, too.”

“Because?”

“Because the bond on twelve counts of grand larceny and aggravated battery must have been pretty steep. Bernie could have gotten his money back, and he didn’t.”

“If he knew where to find the kid.”

“The kid wasn’t exactly hiding. He had his name hanging around his neck. He was a walking investment. In Bernie’s own business. The kid said he thought his outstanding warrants had been taken care of. He made a deal with Bernie. Who owns the mailbox store. It’s the only conclusion that fits the facts.”