Allison Brennan - Sudden Death

But it was worth it.

The needles gave Karin power. She would keep Megan in a constant state of pain. Make her beg to die. Just like Ethan had when he was held captive.

Karin wanted to see that bitch on her knees begging for mercy, begging Karin to shoot her in the head and put an end to the pain. She wanted Megan to see that Karin’s way was the right way and that Megan had ruined everything.

I was given the knowledge of good and evil and I was punishing the wicked for the sake of the innocent. All those who got away. All those who would get away.

For the innocent. For the meek. For those who wouldn’t or couldn’t defend themselves, Karin was their savior, their avenger.

She’d fought and saved herself, hadn’t she?

Because she couldn’t save everyone. She hadn’t been able to save her father from himself. If he hadn’t made her mother angry, if he hadn’t seen things he shouldn’t have seen, Karin wouldn’t have been forced to act. She’d thought Daddy was strong and loved her, but he was weak and pathetic. So ultimately, Judge Standler’s death had been his own damn fault.

“Karin, you have to stop.”

She looked at her daddy and frowned. He was very white and his hands were shaking as he drove the car through heavy traffic in the rain.

“Stop what, Daddy?”

“I know you killed Grandma’s poodle.”

“Why would you say that to me, Daddy?” Tears poured out of her eyes. How had he found out? She’d been so careful. She was always careful.

“Grandma doesn’t know, but I found Daisy’s collar in your desk drawer. Along with your diary.”

“You read my diary?” The tears stopped flowing and anger took their place. So much anger she had no outlet, no way to stop it, molten lava coming up the center of a mountain. The top was going to blow …

“Not just Daisy, but those other pets. You can’t do that, Karin. I–I love you, but I’m scared for you. I want you to see someone.”

He’d read her diary. She’d written everything in her life in that book. About how Margaret Fletcher flirted with Tommy Dressler when Margaret knew that Karin liked Tommy. Margaret kissed Tommy after the softball game when Karin had pitched a no-hitter.

Karin had gone to school with Margaret since kindergarten. So she knew that Margaret had allergies. Lots of them. Like peanuts. She’d seen Margaret go into anaphylactic shock in the second grade when she accidentally took a bite of Dina Huntsberger’s chunky peanut butter and banana sandwich. She didn’t even swallow, but her face turned red and her neck swelled up and Mrs. Burgess had to stick her with a needle to get her to start breathing right.

Tommy wouldn’t like Margaret if he saw her swell up like a balloon and pee on herself.

Karin ground a handful of peanuts into a powder so fine it looked like beige baby powder. The next day at school she walked by Margaret and sneezed in her face, blowing the fine dust of peanuts into the air. Margaret yelled at her, called her a bitch.

You didn’t use those words in Catholic school. Especially not when Sister Pauline was walking by.

But before Sister Pauline could take her to the office, Margaret started choking. Her face turned red and her eyes rolled to the back of her head. Sister Pauline acted fast, pulled an epinephrine kit from Margaret’s backpack, and stuck her with a needle.

Karin watched in amazement as Margaret thrashed on the floor of the hall, wheezing. Sister Pauline told her to get the nurse and another epinephrine kit. Karin did, running as fast as she could. She didn’t want anyone to blame her. And it gave her time to wash her hands, after getting the nurse.

Karin didn’t know then that sometimes people went into comas because of peanut allergies. But that’s what happened to Margaret. She was in a coma for three days and when she woke up she couldn’t talk right. Sister Pauline explained that her brain had been without oxygen for too long and got damaged.

No, Daddy couldn’t have read about Margaret and the peanuts, that was last year, in fifth grade. Karin had already hidden that diary.

“Are you listening to me, Karin?”

“I can’t believe you read my diary.”

“Karin, this is important! I love you, but I can’t let you hurt animals. You have a lot of rage inside. You need to talk to someone who can help you find a healthy outlet for your anger.”

But she hadn’t been angry when she’d drowned Daisy in the pool. She’d just wanted to see what would happen. And the damn dog always barked at her. Her mother hated the noise. Her mother told her to take care of Daisy. “You know what to do, Karin,” Crystal had said. And she had even watched when Karin did it. “What did you feel when you drowned that poor helpless animal?” Mom asked, as if mocking all those shrinks and busybodies out there.

Karin shrugged. “Not much.”

The lava of anger inside her continued to rise as she realized that her father could get her into big trouble. Her mother had told her someday he would have to die. Karin didn’t want to do it. She had loved her father. He bought her beautiful clothes and presents and took her to museums and wonderful places all over the world. Her mother didn’t like to do anything fun.

“You hurt people!” Karin told her father.

“I’ve never hurt anyone.”

“Yes you do. You judge them and send them to the electric chair. Zap! “

Her father shook his head, hands tight on the steering wheel. “They were very bad people. They killed innocent people, Karin. They were guilty of awful crimes.”

“So it’s okay to kill someone if they’re really, really bad?”

“That’s why we have a criminal justice system.”

“Daisy was really, really bad. She bit me.” It was a lie, but it made Karin feel better to say it.

“I’m so sorry, honey, but dropping Daisy in the pool was wrong. She’s just a dog. She didn’t know any better. “

“I thought she could swim back. I didn’t know she would die. I made up that stuff I wrote in my diary.” She burst into tears. She did know Daisy Dog would die. She had made sure of it. She had held Daisy under water when the dog paddled close to the edge. When she had looked at her mother, her mother had smiled.

But Karin hadn’t written that part down in her diary. She’d been learning, taking lessons from the master herself.

“It’s okay, Karin. It’s going to be okay. I’ll make sure you’re okay.”

Daddy was acting strange. “I don’t have to talk to any stupid doctor, do I?”

“It’s for the best. I love you, I know what’s best.”

“Mommy knew.”

“What did your mother know?”

“That I killed Daisy.”

Her father jerked his head toward her, shock on his face. “Why would you say such a thing, Karin? Your mother would be heartbroken-”

She took that moment to scream at the top of her lungs. “DADDY! LOOK OUT!”

He startled, jerked the wheel, even though there was no obstacle in front of their car. She pretended his swerve shoved her across the seat, and she banged against the steering wheel. She didn’t know if he saw her grab the wheel or not, she liked to think he did, and then, when it was too late, she realized that maybe turning the car into oncoming traffic wasn’t the smartest idea she’d ever had …

She woke up the next day and her mother was at her bedside. Karin had a broken arm and a bandage around her head. She hurt all over and felt small bandages on her face and legs.