Simon Lelic - The Child Who

‘You mean you wouldn’t?’

‘I couldn’t. How could I? I’m not going to lie for you, Leo. I mean, I hope that’s not why you asked me here because, really, you should know—’

‘Karen. Please. That’s not what I meant. I’m just…’

‘Thinking aloud?’

‘Exactly.’

There was a silence.

‘What about this…’ Leo rolled his hand. ‘This post-traumatic stress thing. Is there any chance he could have been suffering from that at the time of the attack?’

Karen was already shaking her head. ‘None.’

‘Why not?’

‘The clue is in the question, Leo.’

‘Yes, no, I realise that but could he not have been suffering from something else first? Something that led to whatever he has now?’

‘He killed a girl. That’s why he has post-traumatic stress disorder. You don’t just kill someone and not suffer some emotional backlash. Not unless you’re a psychopath.’

Leo raised his head.

‘Bloody hell, Leo. Don’t look so hopeful. He’s not a psychopath. You surely don’t need a shrink to tell you that.’

‘No.’ Leo slumped. ‘No, of course not.’ He slid his hands across his face. He exhaled again, audibly.

‘What about you, Leo?’

Leo blinked.

‘How are you ? I mean, you look tired and I’m sure you are but apart from that. How are things?’ Karen’s mug was in front of her and she turned it. ‘I heard about your father,’ she added, tentatively. ‘It must have been hard for you.’

Leo felt the weight of her stare. ‘I’m fine,’ he said. ‘Honestly. I mean – ’ he laughed; he had to force it ‘ – is business that bad? Because even if you’re offering me mates’ rates, I’m not sure I could afford you.’ He laughed again, grinned – and felt a burn building in his jaw.

Karen, for a moment, made him suffer it. ‘You can’t fool me,’ she said. And then she smiled. ‘A celebrity lawyer like you?’ She gestured. ‘That tie,’ she said. ‘That suit. They’re just a disguise to throw off all the gold-diggers. Right?’

Leo looked down at what he was wearing.

‘What about Megan, though,’ Karen persisted. ‘And Eleanor. This whole thing must be quite a strain for you all.’

‘A strain?’ Leo, involuntarily, thought of the note. It was a prank, he had decided. Whoever wrote it: a crank. Which was the reason he had not yet mentioned it to his wife. ‘Why do you say that?’

‘Come on, Leo. Don’t be disingenuous. This isn’t exactly a drunk and disorderly you’re dealing with here.’

No. Exactly. Karen, if no one else, understood. ‘That’s the thing, though,’ said Leo. ‘It was always going to be outside our comfort zone. We expected that from the start.’

‘We?’

Now Leo, in spite of himself, bridled. ‘It’s important, Karen. Daniel needs my help. I’m not going to forsake him just because everyone else seems to think he should be left to rot.’

‘No. Of course not. I understand that completely. I just…’ Karen seemed to contemplate saying something more. ‘I didn’t mean to pry,’ she said instead. ‘You looked tired, that’s all.’ She smiled until Leo mirrored it.

‘I’m fine,’ he said. ‘Meg, Ellie: we’re all fine.’

‘Good. I’m glad to hear it.’ Karen slid her mug to the centre of the table. She smiled once more and she stood.

‘Wait,’ Leo said, standing too. ‘You’re not going? What about Daniel?’

‘We agreed, Leo: first impressions, that’s all.’

‘I know but there must be something. Mustn’t there?’

‘Something? You mean some reason why a boy of twelve murders a girl he barely knows?’ Karen, all of a sudden, looked weary. She sighed once more and her strength, with her breath, seemed to leave her. She propped herself against the table. ‘There’s always a reason, Leo. Sometimes there are a thousand reasons.’

‘I just need one. Just to start with. Diminished responsibility, Karen: it’s the only chance Daniel’s got.’

Karen made a face. ‘You’re looking at this backwards. Aren’t you? I thought the idea was to consider the evidence and then decide your plea.’

‘Maybe. Sometimes. But you said it yourself: there’s always a reason. Right?’

Karen regarded him. She stood straighter and buttoned her coat.

‘Daniel’s family,’ she said. ‘Is there any way I could meet with them?’

‘Maybe.’ Leo looked up. ‘Why? What did he say about them?’

Karen came close and kissed Leo’s cheek. ‘Take care of yourself, Leo. Try and catch up on some sleep.’

Leo tracked her progress towards the door. ‘Karen?’

She turned.

‘What did he say about them?’

Karen twitched a shoulder. ‘Nothing,’ she said. ‘Nothing at all.’

It had not worked.It always worked. Think of an outcome: the worst thing that could happen or the most unlikely or even, sometimes, the thing you most wanted to take place – and it would not. That was the rule. So sometimes it worked to spite you and sometimes it worked as a ward but it always, one way or another, worked.

Except it had not.

The envelope had been tucked amid the pile of letters. Leo had been late after spending most of the day out of the office, so he had carried the pile into the meeting room. He had shuffled and shuffled again and as he had backed himself blindly into his seat, there it was. Just where he had expected it to be and just, therefore, where it should not have been.

‘Leonard?’

‘Mm.’

‘Leonard.’

Leo looked up. ‘What? Yes. Sorry, I…’

Howard smiled his concern.

‘Sorry,’ said Leo, more decisively. He slid the pile of mail below the table and into his lap, his thumbs pinning the topmost envelope in place. Beneath them, and beneath its outer skin, the note seared.

‘So what do you think?’

Leo could not resist peeking. The question, though, registered and he glanced up to see who would answer. Alan, John, Terry, Howard; even Jenny, seated between Leo and their boss and jotting minutes on a notepad: everyone present had their gaze fixed on him.

‘Me?’

There was laughter, not all of it kind.

‘You are fairly central to the proposal, Leonard. But if you feel it would make you uncomfortable…’

‘What? No. Of course not. Um. If what would make me uncomfortable?’

Terry turned and muttered. Howard spoke over him.

‘The feature, Leonard. The interview.’

The words resonated. On their way into the room, someone had been talking about an article. For a newspaper – or a magazine? The Lawyer was it? The Law Society Gazette ?

‘Well,’ Leo said, as though considering. ‘What would be the focus, exactly?’

Jenny looked down at her notes. Howard simply stared.

‘Honestly, Leo,’ said Terry. ‘I hope you pay closer attention in meetings with clients.’

More laughter. A ‘quite’. Leo felt himself flush.

‘Let’s recap,’ said Howard. ‘Shall we? It’s exciting news so I’m not exactly loath to repeat it.’ He turned to Leo. ‘Although I do hope once more will be enough.’

Leo, in spite of himself, was slinking another glance at the envelope. He pressed it flat with his palms, tweaked his frown and aimed it at his boss.

‘The Gazette , Leo, has approached us with a suggestion for a feature. Small firm, big case: that sort of thing. They won’t mention anything too specific, of course, but they’ll want to talk to you. They’ll want to photograph you. As well as the rest of us, naturally. We wouldn’t want you stealing all the glory.’ Howard twinkled and Jenny tittered. Terry, from his expression, seemed not to appreciate the joke.