Xu Lei - Search for the Buried Bomber

The Outer Edge

The light was very dim, probably emanating from one of the emergency lights we’d seen earlier. Who knew what was on the other side? But this was our last and only hope. Even if it ran through a tiger’s den or a dragon’s lair, so long as it led out of here, we’d have to charge ahead. There was no need to deliberate over which tunnel to take. The three openings clearly led to the same place. We wriggled into the middle one and crawled thirty or forty feet to the end. A frozen iron grate was fastened over the opening. Ice covered the space between the bars and a faint light shined through, but it was impossible to make out what was on the other side. Ma Zaihai removed the bullets from his rifle, then smashed the butt of it against the four corners of the grate. The space was extremely cramped. He couldn’t use much force. After working at it for some time, the grate finally opened and a powerful wind rushed in, stealing the breath from my lungs. I ducked my head at once and gasped for air. Covering my mouth with my overcoat, I looked out. It was utter blackness. Nothing was out there.

The three of us looked at each other. Beyond this tunnel wasn’t some room, it was the endless abyss. Looking out, we saw a stretch of nothingness. There was only the crazed wind pouring dizzyingly into the tunnel. The mist really had dispersed. Even our flashlight beams picked up nothing. Ma Zaihai yelled that he was going to stick his head out to look. We grabbed the hem of his coat. A gust of wind came from behind us as soon as his shoulders were outside, ballooning his clothes. He floated outward as if he were being pulled. His face turned pale with fright, but we held fast and he didn’t fall. “Quickly now,” said Wang Sichuan. “Take a look around and see what’s out there.”

He lay flat and shimmied his torso out. He shined his flashlight all about. Then we pulled him back in. “This is the bottom of the dam,” he said. “There’s a cliff about thirty feet below us. Beside the opening is a ladder leading down to it.”

“Is there any sign of Old Cat and the others?” I asked him.

“How am I supposed to make them out?” he replied. He could see the searchlight up above, but it was far away. This really was the very bottom of the dam, with only crisscrossing layers of cement and rock all around. The flashlight beam stretched only a short distance and nothing could be seen clearly.

“Does the ladder go up as well?” asked Wang Sichuan.

“It’s a little unreliable,” he replied. “The wind is too great, stronger even than it was atop the dam, and the ladder is already decayed. If we were to climb halfway up and it snapped, well…I don’t think I need to say what would happen.”

I felt this was a risk we could take. It was just too cold in here. Even the fierce wind rushing in from outside felt comparatively warm. If we continued to search the electrical canal, we wouldn’t be able to last much longer. Here at least we had a slim chance of survival. The bars on the ladder were thick as a thumb and very sturdy. What happened earlier with the deputy squad leader was likely a freak accident. As long as we took care while climbing up, we should be fine. The three of us talked it over. “Let’s not decide yet,” said Wang Sichuan. “We’ll check it out and if it’s not all right, we’ll just head back.”

With that, Ma Zaihai rubbed his hands, reached one arm out, grabbed on to the ladder, and swung over to it, his coat flying open in the wind. Trying as best he could to stick close to the wall, he yelled out to us, but even from such a short distance we couldn’t make out what he was saying. He could only signal that it was all right. Then he climbed up.

I was next. I felt a stab of terror the moment I leaned out. It was like leaning into outer space. There was nothing beyond. Below me was the abyss. If I fell, who knew if I’d ever hit bottom? All I could feel was the gale-force wind. Grabbing tightly to the ladder, I swung over. For an instant I began to fly, but I adapted, adjusted my movements, and stuck myself to the wall of the dam. I climbed up enough for Wang Sichuan to come out. Shining my flashlight down, I watched him climb on. He was much heavier than us and therefore much more stable.

With a solid grip on the ladder, I began to observe my surroundings. Before me was the dam. My flashlight beam illuminated a long, narrow strip of its concrete wall. Only a section of it was visible, the more distant areas merging gradually into the blackness. Its surface was extremely rough and covered in a layer of some dark substance, similar in color to the mist. The substance was on the ladder as well. I looked at my hands. They were coated in a thin layer of the stuff, like liquid but also like dust. I immediately wiped them on my coat and covered them with my sleeves for protection. The devil only knows if this stuff’s poisonous, I thought.

As for the space behind me, what was there to say? Nothing was out there. I felt like we were holding on to the very edge of the world. I began to regret my decision. Who knew how far we’d have to climb? It was impossible to say. Even now my heart clenches as I think back on it. As I shined my flashlight about, I saw this wasn’t the only ladder. More appeared in the distance, a number of them in fact, each spaced a long ways apart. Between them jutted parallel rows of steel bars like the ones that had saved me earlier, each curved into a hook one could hold on to. They had evidently been placed to allow workers to travel from one ladder to another, stepping on the bars below, grabbing on to those above. They must have been used during construction and maintenance. Then something occurred to me: Here, at the bottom of the dam, what was there for them to inspect or repair?

Having seen Wang Sichuan firmly on the ladder, Ma Zaihai put his flashlight between his teeth and began to climb. The two of us followed his lead. It was impossible to think amid the blasts of wind. Just to breathe required all of my focus. I had no concept of how many rungs I climbed or how far we’d come. In a situation like that, you’re neither calm nor agitated. Your state of mind becomes very unusual. As I looked back at the interminable blackness behind me, I realized this was probably the feeling of awakening. My body and soul seemed to comprehend some message, one that had arrived from somewhere miraculous. Had I continued to feel this way, I doubtlessly would have been converted straightaway to Buddhism or some other religion, but this mood was cut short by Ma Zaihai’s boots.

I looked up. He had stopped, and my head had smacked right into his boots. I looked around. At once I saw it: Off to the right, about sixty feet from us, was some colossal thing of concrete and steel bars, like a great, spiny hedgehog perched on the wall. Its massive round body was made of concrete, and the bars were its spines. The whole thing was enormous, roughly the size of a three-story house. From this distance it appeared to be nothing less than some monstrous creature.

Ma Zaihai gazed at it for a moment. Then, climbing onto one of the steel bars next to us, he began making his way across. My principle has always been “Don’t look for trouble.” The moment I saw him step out I felt anxious. I climbed a little higher and yelled over, “What are you doing?”

He turned around, the sound of his voice drifting in and out as he called back. “That’s the antenna!”

“Why are you worrying about that now?” I shouted. “Our first priority is getting out of here!”

Some idea seemed to have taken hold of him. “Wait right there,” he told me. “I’m going to check it out.”