Wolf Haas - Eternal Life

“Resurrection of the Dead.”

“Yeah, yeah, even though it wasn’t even Easter.”

“What did you actually mean by that at the time?”

“Well, if the Parsons were issuing checks after their deaths. For all intents and purposes, they’d have to be resurrected. It was no different for Jesus, either.”

“So, plural: the dead. Possessive: of the dead.”

“Yeah, say, Brenner!”

“But for Jesus, it’d be singular: Resurrection of the dead.”

“Yeah, say, Brenner, what are you asking me all this for?”

“For what, Mandl, it’s: for what are you asking me all this. And what is it when Vergolder’s sister is resurrected?”

“It’s-aha! Yet again, Resurrection of the dead.”

“Exactly. Because that’s what we’ve got uncountable nouns for.”

“ ‘The Grammar Gumshoe!’ Our last reader will be proud of you, Brenner. And the dead, resurrected after fifty years, just so she could bring two others to their deaths. Rather un-Christian, so far as resurrection goes.”

“Maybe she just wanted to make her brother nervous.”

“ ‘Paranormal Trickery!’ Didn’t pull it off, though. She turns back up after fifty years, but the Zellers simply aren’t scared. Ghost completely forgotten. Had to stir things up a little in Zell. Get some stories buzzing around. Get people excited about the Heidnische Kirche.”

“But you guys still weren’t scared.”

“Exactly, we don’t scare that easy. So, the ghost had to stir things up a little more.”

“But you guys still weren’t scared. Exactly, Mandl.”

“But we were! Me and my reader, we were scared that there were dead people hopping the ski lift.”

“But only because they didn’t have a day pass.”

“Eh, Brenner, what good’s a day pass at night. But one thing you still have to explain to me. Why did the ghost go to such lengths? Normally, a ghost like that would just get a revolver. Not a ski lift, though.”

“Except the ghost didn’t have any hands.”

“Logical, except the ghost didn’t have any hands. So, better off with the big, blunt lever on the lift.”

“That’s it, Mandl.”

“But how does a ghost like that get you to sit on a ski lift all night? How does she lure you there?”

“Very simple.”

Brenner hadn’t quite noticed. In his left hand, he was holding the receiver, but his right index finger, well, it was like it had a will of its own. Simply pressed the button on the cradle and away with Mandl.

It has to be said, Mandl simply had no knack for journalism. Every detail interested him. But how Lorenz got rubbed out by his own parents, Vergolder and Vergolder’s sister, one more brutal than the next. Mandl would’ve made a tragedy out of it, practically Greek. But, no.

Now, maybe telepathy does exist or something, because at that moment, where Brenner’s thinking, A pity about Kati Engljähringer, and maybe I’ll try giving her another call, I’ve got the time now-the phone rings again, and needless to say, Mandl again:

“Antretter’s sister told the police that it was Lorenz who orchestrated the keys to the lift and the checks from his uncle’s.”

“Must’ve been,” Brenner says.

Because Elfi, she now had a dead father who’d never even officially been her father. And she’d dropped out of school. And her job, of course, you can scratch that, too. And Lorenz, dead. And the only person who’d ever took any care of her, in prison. And Brenner thought, Elfi’s stuck in Zell, and that’s punishment enough. But Mandl says:

“Now, I’ve got a freshly typed article lying here that’ll make Mandl famous. Because he uncovers that Elfi must’ve been responsible for the keys to the lift. Besides which, she helped the old American into the chair lift up at the terminal station, while Handless was waiting down at the valley station with the other American.”

“How are you able to shave when you’re constantly retching into the mirror?”

“Electric, Brenner. With the Phili-shaver. I’m a pro at shaving. But good ol’ Mandl’s got a little deal to strike with you now. A deal, Brenner.”

“A deal for who?”

“For little Elfi Lohninger, alias Clare Corrigan, a deal. Because I’m just going to put this article in my drawer for now. And that’s where it’ll stay. Until the moment where you get the big idea of calling-or in any other way contacting-the lovely schoolteacher, Frau Kati Engljähringer.”

“You’re a real mensch, Mandl. Then, please give my regards to Engljähringer, unless that falls under ‘contact,’ too.”

The report, now. These things don’t just happen right away, Brenner thought, and it was only six-thirty. And maybe before I get started I’ll take a Migradon. Because, needless to say, talking on the phone only made his headache worse.

First he goes to the mailbox, maybe some welcome news. But only a letter from the Civil Service Housing Authority. It looked so official that Brenner thought better of opening it up today.

Now, the report. He would’ve preferred hitting the sack, even though it was only just after six-thirty. Because three Migradons, and not the slightest effect. But, no wonder, because people would remember this year for a long time to come.

Now, one thing you can’t forget. It was already the twenty-fifth of September. And still twenty-seven degrees Celsius. And believe it or not. Thirteen hours later, Brenner would be woken up by the sound of the snowplows.