Paolo Bacigalupi - The Doubt Factory

Except she still had more to do. She still had to see if the seed she’d planted…

George was cutting through the crowds toward her father and Mr. Geier.

Alix took a deep breath and pushed off from the rail. Stay sober . Which was a total laugh because she was feeling more and more hammered by the minute.

Suck it up, Alix. You’re not getting another shot at this .

She stumbled after the trio of men, keeping her eye on them. They ducked through a door into the boat’s interior cabins. Alix pressed through the crowd, hurrying to catch up. It couldn’t be a coincidence. She’d poked them, and they’d reacted.

Alix slipped through the door. She found herself in the yacht’s media center, the walls lined with flatscreen TVs, eight feet across. She slipped off her heels and stole across the parquet floors. She padded down a hallway, pausing at each door to listen.

At last, she found them in what Alix decided was a library. At least, the room had a ton of books on the wall, from what she could glimpse through the decorative porthole in the door. She wondered if Geier had read any of them at all. Maybe his wife read. Or maybe the books were just for guests.

The men’s voices filtered dimly through the door. Alix leaned against the oak, trying to hear, then, holding her breath, she eased the sliding panel slightly wider, blessing the Dutch for their silent precision. Not a click, not a slide, just voices wafting louder out into the corridor.

“Where else could they hit you?” George was asking Geier. “They like getting on the news. Are you planning any press events?”

Geier’s voice sounded puzzled as he went through possibilities. “We’ve got our quarterly call with investors. The FDA came back with a ruling that Azicort doesn’t require a second look. Would it be that?”

“No, 2.0 likes public events,” her father said. “They’ll go after something big and public. Something they can prank. Something that will cause embarrassment.”

“This party is about as public as Kimball-Geier is going to be for a while.”

“You don’t think they’re on the yacht?” George asked.

“They’re kids, not miracle workers,” Dad said.

“Did you hear what Williams and Crowe said about that virus Alix brought back? That would have been a serious problem if it had gotten into our servers.”

“It didn’t,” Dad said sharply. There was a pause, and then he said, “So where else are we vulnerable? Public events. Think about public places that will attract news attention.”

“We’ve got depositions scheduled for the Romano class action down in Louisiana. We’ve got a presser….”

“No. They’re not like that. What if they went after Sammons?”

“The man’s solid. He won’t say anything. He knows he’s got a job waiting for him as soon as he steps down from the FDA.”

“What about our science witnesses for the appeal? Would they go after them?” George asked. “2.0 spends an awful lot of time worrying about science testimony. You saw what they had up on the walls with that last stunt.”

“I just don’t see it. We’ve got Renner. I mean, sure, he’s a hack, but he’s happy to say whatever we want. And I think with Hsu, we’ve got someone a jury will like. His credentials look good, given all his papers that we’ve published.”

“Would they go after our respiratory journal?”

“They can’t do anything more to us than what opposing counsel will already try. It won’t affect the trial. We got most of the credentialing issues excluded by the judge. It won’t be a problem until they try another appeal, and that will be years….”

Delay = $$$

Alix didn’t want to listen anymore. She padded away, as quietly as her drunken state would allow, and made her way back into the fresh sea air. She leaned against the rail, trying to force herself to breathe.

Just breathe. Don’t think about it .

She wasn’t sure how long she stood at the rail, staring out at the city lights reflecting on the waters, but it must have been for a long time because the next thing she was aware of was Dad joining her.

“Alix?”

Not him. Anyone but him . Alix couldn’t bring herself to meet his eyes. She made herself smile, but it felt fake, and yet it was all she could muster. At least you’re drunk .

“Hi, Dad.”

“George told me you were drinking?”

“Yeah.” She looked out at the city lights again. Now that he was leaning on the rail, too, she didn’t have to look straight at him. She could just act like the view was the most amazing thing she’d ever seen.

“I don’t mind if you have a glass,” Dad said. “You’re very nearly an adult. But getting drunk, Alix?”

“Yeah.” She made herself laugh. “That was stupid, I know.”

“I’m worried about you.”

I’m starting to think I might hate you .

She couldn’t look at him. She was terrified that he’d be able to see what she was thinking. “I know,” she said finally. She kept her eyes on the skyline. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to. I mean, I’ve been thinking a lot. Everything that happened before, it really got to me for a while. But I think it’s actually going to be okay now.”

“It doesn’t look like things are okay.”

Alix shrugged. “I think it’s like AA.”

“Do you think you’re an alcoholic?” Dad sounded so worried that Alix almost laughed.

“No!” She paused. “I didn’t mean it like that. I mean that first you have to admit you’ve got a problem. After that, it’s a lot easier to decide what you need to do.” She shrugged again. “I just couldn’t admit how much the whole kidnapping thing got to me.” She made herself smile at him, feeling like a bitch for lying and doing it anyway. “You were right. I was burying it.”

Dad wrapped an arm around her shoulders. Alix’s skin crawled as he gave her a comforting hug, but she forced herself not to draw away.

“It would be hard for anyone,” Dad said. “I’m sorry you had to go through it.”

“It’s okay. I’m fine. I mean, I will be. I’ll be fine.” She made herself smile, and suddenly it was real for her. She could lie to him because she wasn’t lying at all. Suddenly she could smile radiantly. “I have a feeling it’s going to get better from now on.”

“Oh?”

“I realized that I was having a hard time because they were trying to fuck with my mind. I mean, sorry. I mean…”

Dad was too cool to worry about the language. He just nodded.

Alix plunged on. “Anyway, that’s what it was. They were trying to make me believe in their crazy world instead of me believing in my own….” She trailed off. “But I’m not an idiot. I can trust myself. Just because I get fooled once by someone, it doesn’t mean I’m always going to be fooled by them.”

“We only learn from our mistakes.”

“Yeah.” Alix nodded. “In a weird way, if it hadn’t been for 2.0, I would never have figured out how important it is to have honest people around you.”

“I’m glad, Alix.”

“Yeah, well.” She shrugged. “Being surrounded by liars will do that to you.”

SURROUNDED BY LIARS, ALIX FOUNDherself becoming one. She forced herself to smile, made herself be the good girl that Mom and Dad wanted her to be, and at night she did more and more research. After Jonah’s intruding on her and her scattered notes, she became more careful about her research.

She created new filing systems and password-protected her laptop, she bought a little key safe at the mall and stuck it under her bed to keep her papers in, and she laid a few of her hairs on top just to make sure that no one messed with it without her knowing.