Robert Walker - Unnatural Instinct

“ Not from what I hear. You went without sleep, you put your life on hold for me, and then you put your life in danger for me, going into that bam for me, braving Purdy and fire.”

“ Please, I only wish I could've done more-a lot sooner.”

DeCampe waved this off. “I want you to know that if ever I can repay you… Well, we both know that is impossible.”

“ All of us down at the bureau just want to see you back on the bench, Judge. That would be reward enough.”

Jessica thought that DeCampe's skin grafts had healed beautifully, and that the healthy tissue below that which had decayed had bonded perfectly with the skin taken from other areas of the woman's body. “You look wonderful, by the way,” she told the judge. “Thanks, the doctors here are the best.”

“ I know. We flew them in from Johns Hopkins and the Mayo Clinic.”

“ Oh, I had no idea.”

“ The FBI and the U.S.A. are footing your medical bills, Judge DeCampe.”

“ So my daughters have told me.”

“ But there's a catch.”

“ And that being?”

“ You also continue with psychotherapy.”

DeCampe half smiled and nodded. “Thank you for caring so much, Jessica, and as it happens, I will have plenty of time to pursue psychological help along with the rehab.”

“ That's good to hear, Judge.”

“ Maureen, please… please call me Maureen.”

“ You do look remarkably well, Your Honor.”

“ You can stop that.”

“ But I mean it.”

“ I mean the 'Your Honor' stuff. I'm no longer a judge. I'm done with that life. I won't be returning to the bench, not after this.”

“ I… I had no idea.”

“ No one does. You're the first to know. I don't know why it is important for me to tell you this, but… well… you gave me my life back; you granted me a second chance with my children, with life itself. I'm retiring early to enjoy what is left to me.”

“ That's commendable… good news, I think.”

“ Well… when you've really got one foot literally in the grave-something few of us ever really experience-it does change your outlook.”

“ I just didn't want that bastard to win,” Jessica said through gritted teeth.

Maureen shook her head. 'Trust me, he didn't win. He isn't taking me off the bench. I am. I am taking control of my life again, and I'll never allow anyone ever to do it for me again in any way, shape, or form.”

“ There's someone I would like you to meet, Judge DeCampe,” said Jessica.

Kim Desinor entered the room, going to DeCampe and extending a hand that lightly fell over the judge's forearm. The touch was magical. Somehow DeCampe knew that Desinor was extremely important and instrumental in finding her, but only a handful of words were shared: “How are you,” and “You are looking fine,” and “I know you will be on your feet soon.”

Kim had made a full recovery, not a psychic wound evident, but this strange miracle had occurred only after Judge DeCampe was truly found. Kim had earlier thanked Jessica for “saving my life” as she put it. They had hugged and cried together, and Kim had wanted a full description of how they had found DeCampe, and how Purdy had been dispatched.

Richard Sharpe stepped into the room just as Jessica was trying to determine exactly the price exacted from Maureen DeCampe at the hands of the madman who'd abducted and tortured her in so heinous a fashion. Jessica caught the facial expression, the glint in the eye that rose and waned all in a millisecond, one that spoke of DeCampe's honest indecision about this decision made for her, most likely, by the worried family.

Richard warmly greeted DeCampe, asking after her comfort, asking if he could get her anything from the hospital commissary.

DeCampe declined, and they said their pleasant goodbyes. On leaving the hospital, Jessica confided in Richard, holding his hand as they walked, “I believe that the nightmare ordeal that woman has gone through will decide her entire future.”

He nodded. “One way or another, I am sure it will.” They made their way down in the elevator.

“ Don't you see?” continued Jessica.

“ See what, sweetheart?”

“ That at the back of her mind, she knows that the horror she endured will always be-in one form or another-in control of her.”

“ So, what're you saying, Jess? That she can't get past this? Ever?'

“ I couldn't.”

“ But you'd have to, to live a normal life.”

“ Richard, she is adept at deflecting the depth of her pain.”

“ Isn't that preferable to the alternative? No control? To live the rest of one's life in fear?”

“ She thinks she chooses to no longer be a judge.”

“ That will be her decision.”

“ No, don't you see? She only thinks she's making the decision,” Jessica replied, throwing her hands up.

Past the information desk now and out into the light of a crisp day, they made their way to the parking lot. “She thinks she knows her mind.” All the way to the car, she kept spinning the same thought: The judge intends instead to devote all her time to her family. The family now is all around her, and outwardly all is serenity. Maybe she needs the illusion of serenity, and she even believes it herself at this time, but in six months, in a year, she might well have a change of heart and wish to return to her passion, the law.

“ But in the meantime, in a way, Jimmy Lee and Isaiah won,” Jessica said to Richard as he slipped inside the car beside her. “Those bastards will continue to run through her nightmares and continue to win, unless the woman can take real advantage of good professional help.”

“ Shannon Keyes is working on that department, my worried sweetheart. You can't do it all alone, Jess.” She leaned into him and they kissed, and he held her firmly against his chest. 'Time we got some alone time, Richard.”

“ I'm in absolute agreement, Jess. Absolutely.”

John Thorpe had returned to consciousness but remained in the hospital for long-term observation. One of his doctors feared he could lapse into a coma again. Another said this was highly unlikely. A third said there was no way to know at this point. J. T. only wanted to find his pants, get up, and get back to his lab in Quantico, vowing never to leave it ever again, feeling a great deal safer in the confines of its walls. He believed himself fully recovered from his life- threatening wound, and when he came out of the coma, he found Jessica at his bedside, fast asleep, holding his hand. He'd called this his best medicine.

Jessica insisted on remaining until she knew for certain that J. T. was out of any trouble. J. T. had been sleeping fitfully on and off since his “return.”

Eriq Santiva had come to Jessica the day after J. T. had come out of the coma. He had come to see J. T. but also to tell her again what an excellent job she had done on the DeCampe case, and that her superiors were extremely pleased with the results and her performance in particular. She had won over her worst critics in the department, according to Eriq. And then he launched into a confession of sorts, admitting how close he came to pulling her off the case when things looked at a standstill.

“ Eriq, you never fooled me.”

“ What do you mean?” He feigned ignorance.

She walked him just outside J. T.'s room and lashed out at him. “Eriq-boss-I've known since you took over the office that your ambition superseded all else, including anything we might call a relationship.”

“ Now, Jess, that's not really fair.”

“ I know you have done secret info reports on me to our superiors to-”

“ Only to… only because…”

“ I know why! To keep the bastards at bay. I know I have enemies at the highest levels of the bureau.” People milled about them where they stood in the hallway, visitors in search of room numbers, patients combating boredom, walking the corridor. Santiva's eyes followed every move made around him, a sign of paranoia, she thought. Did he really believe they were being watched?