Джеймс Чейз - So What Happens To Me?

Harry had got the guns on board and I took charge of them. I concealed one of the Armalite AR 180 high velocity rifles in Essex’s bedroom. I put it under the mattress. This rifle fired a .223 dum-dum bullet that would kill instantly. The second Armalite I concealed in one of the staff cabins. The Thompson sub-machine gun, known as a Chicago Piano, I hid in the flight cabin. The six hand grenades I hid in a locker by the entrance door to the kite. The machine pistols we decided we would carry on our hips. I took Bernie and Harry around, showing them where I had concealed the weapons.

‘We may not need them.’ I said, ‘but if there’s trouble, you know where to find them.’

I could see Bernie didn’t like any of this and he looked pale, worried and he sweated. Harry just nodded.

Well, that seemed to be that. We had three hours to wait before we took off. I said I was going to pack my things, left them and returned to my cabin. I gave myself a drink, lit a cigarette, then after hesitating, I put a call through to my old man. This, I knew, was the last time I would speak to him. I realised as I was waiting for the connection that I would miss him and again I had doubts that I was planning the right thing for my future.

He came on the line after a delay.

‘I was cutting the grass Jack. I only just heard the bell.’

I asked him how he was.

‘I’m all right. And you?’

‘I’m fine.’ I told him we were night testing the Condor.

‘Is that dangerous?’

I forced a laugh.

‘Nothing to it. Dad, just routine. I have a few minutes to kill and I got thinking of you: I enjoyed my stay.’ I wanted to say something nice to him to remember me by. ‘That was a great evening we had together. We’ll repeat it.’

‘You’re sure this night flight is going to be all right?’

‘Sure, Dad.’ I paused, then plunged on. ‘I’ve got to go now. I just wanted to hear your voice again. Take care of yourself.’

‘There’s nothing wrong?’

‘Everything’s fine. Well, see you Dad,’ and I hung up.

I sat staring at the opposite wall. I felt it had been a mistake to call him. Now I knew he would worry. He was shrewd. I hadn’t ever called him long distance before. Well, at least I had heard his voice for the last time.

I gave myself another drink, then my mind switched to Mrs. Essex. I had a longing to hear her voice too for the last time, but I hesitated. This could be a dangerous call. I decided against it, but after wandering around my cabin and having another drink, I walked over to the telephone and dialled the number of the Essex home. I told myself if the butler answered, I would hang up but she answered.

‘Hi!’ I said.

‘Oh... you.’

‘Yes. Can you talk?’

‘He’s not back until Tuesday: yes. I can talk.’

That marvellous voice! I saw that body and those violet coloured eyes.

‘I’ve missed you,’ I said.

‘Let’s do something tonight Jack.’ Her voice was urgent. ‘Jackson is taking his wife to a show. He’ll be out of the way. Let’s meet somewhere.’

‘I can’t. We’re doing a night test flight on the Condor at 20.30. I’ve got to go along.’

‘Oh, hell! I want you Jack!’

‘How about Sunday night?’ I was now wishing I hadn’t started this and knowing on Sunday night I would be in Yucatan.

‘Can’t you get out of this test flight?’

‘Not a chance.’ I now really wished I hadn’t started this. I knew how determined she could be. ‘Let’s make it Sunday, huh?’

‘No! Jackson will be around: He’ll be around Monday too. It must be tonight!’

‘It can’t be done I’m sorry. I’ll call you later,’ and I hung up.

That was a mistake, I told myself. Why couldn’t I keep my stupid mouth shut? I looked at the time. It was just after 19.00. As I flung my things into a suitcase, the phone bell rang. Fearing it was Mrs. Essex, I ignored it. I went to the restaurant and joined Bernie and Harry for a steak dinner. Bernie looked uneasy. He scarcely ate a thing.

‘Did you talk to Pam?’ I asked.

‘She’s now on her way to Merida.’

‘She okay?’

He blotted his sweating face with his handkerchief.

‘I think so. She doesn’t like it, of course, but she’ll be all right once we join up.’

‘Yeah.’ To change the subject, I said. ‘How do you feel about landing the kite in the dark and the jungle?’

‘The Met report is good. I don’t see any problem.’

I shoved my plate away and looked at my watch. The time was 20.15.

‘Might as well get moving.’ I stood up.

Harry said. ‘Just for the hell of it, I stocked the fridge. We could get hungry.’

‘That’s a smart idea.’

‘I don’t believe in starving.’ Harry grinned. ‘If we get lost, a fridge full of food is a great morale booster.’

‘We won’t get lost!’ Bernie snapped. ‘Don’t talk wet!’

Harry winked at me and we followed Bernie out into the starlit night and climbed into a jeep. The three of us knew this was the last time we would be on American soil. It was a sobering thought and none of us spoke as Harry drove us to the waiting Condor.

The crew were waiting. The Chief Engineer, a guy named Thompson, gave me a thumb’s up sign as we got out of the jeep.

‘All correct, Mr. Crane.’ he said and grinned. There was something sly about that grin that made me stare at him, but when Bernie said, ‘Let’s go,’ I thought no more about it.

Bernie and Harry went to the flight cabin. I closed the exit door and then joined them.

Bernie went through the takeoff routine, then talked to Air Control.

‘Okay, Fred?’

‘Sure: no traffic around, Bernie. It’s all yours.’

A few minutes later we were airborne. We looked at one another.

‘Three million dollars, here we come!’ Harry exclaimed.

I stood around until Bernie headed out to sea. I was feeling restless. I left them and wandered into the conference room, looked around, then went into the kitchen. I peered into the refrigerator. There was a good selection of canned foods. I went past Essex’s suite and entered one of the guest cabins where I had left my suitcase. There was nothing for me to do for at least forty minutes. I lay on the bed, lit a cigarette and tried not to think of my future, but I didn’t succeed. I kept thinking I was walking out on a top class job, paying thirty thousand a year and I was also walking out on Mrs. Essex. A million and a half dollars! What the hell would I do with all that money? I asked myself. I would have to begin an entirely new life. It was all right to imagine living in Europe, but I couldn’t speak any language except my own. I was cutting myself of from a way of life I had known. Was money everything? So why had I started this? This was pretty late thinking, I told myself. I was committed now. In forty minutes I would be dead to my old man. to Mrs. Essex and to the various people who knew me. I had got beyond the point of no return.

I looked out of the cabin window and watched the lights of Paradise City, then Miami fading in the distance. I watched until a sea mist blotted them out and I realised I was seeing them for the last time.

Worried by my thoughts, I went back to the flight cabin.

Looking at the altimeter over Bernie’s shoulder, I saw he was climbing.

‘Another ten minutes,’ Harry said.

When Bernie got to twenty-five thousand feet, he levelled out.

‘Harry, you talk to Fred,’ he said, his voice husky. ‘I’ve got the shakes.’

Harry and I looked at each other. He raised his eyebrows.

‘No, you haven’t, Bernie.’ I said, putting my hands on his shoulders. ‘You dreamed this one up. You handle it.’

He shook of my hands and wiped his sweating face.