William Krueger - Boundary waters

She crossed the yard. The grass was still a deep green. Down a gentle slope on her left, cornflower blue behind a line of cedars, lay another lake, the one called Iron. She mounted the two steps to the door of the white trailer home. Out of habit born of a lifetime of cultural hammering, she knocked politely. Did she expect Wendell to answer? Something in her resisted still the idea he was gone forever, and she waited, as if a few breaths of time would make a difference. But nothing would, not for Wendell, not ever. Finally, she stepped in.

The trailer had a large main room separated from the kitchen by a counter. A bathroom and bedroom were down a short hallway. The place was clean, well kept, the furniture simple. A soft brown sofa, a green easy chair, a television, a table with a couple of chairs where Wendell ate. White curtains, glowing with sunshine, hung in the windows. A compact metal fireplace with a glass door stood in one corner. It was what Wendell used for heat when his propane burner was on the blink. Next to it sat a wood rack that held a few logs and kindling.

She hadn’t grieved for Wendell. There’d been no time. At the moment, she didn’t feel sadness. In fact, what suffused all her being was a profound sense of relief and a deep gratitude at still being alive. In this place that reflected Wendell’s spirit so evidently-right down to the birch-bark lampshade and the smell of sawed wood that had come to be like perfume to her-she still felt wonderfully safe. Grieving would come, she knew, in its own time. Right now, she was too damn tired.

The trailer was chilly, holding in the cold of the last few days. Wendell, even when it was warm, laid a fire in the fireplace most evenings. He’d told her that he’d spent so much time around a campfire, the smell of wood smoke was almost as essential to him as the air itself. Shiloh put kindling and wood in the fireplace and lit a fire. Now the place seemed well and truly full of Wendell.

She checked the refrigerator, took out bologna and bread, and wolfed a dry sandwich washed down with a Coke. She caught sight of herself in a small mirror that hung on the wall and she nearly leaped back in horror. Her hair jutted out in short, ragged splashes. Her face was smeared with mud and charcoal. She looked down at her hands. Grime had worked under the fingernails, giving her five black crescent moons on each hand. A grout of dirt filled the creases at her knuckles. The lines of her palms were black as poisoned veins.

She went to the bathroom, the first indoor plumbing she’d seen in weeks. She ran water in the sink until it was hot, then took the soap from the small green dish and began to scrub. The hot water felt wonderful. It ran down her cheeks, long hot fingers stroking her neck. She glanced at the tub only a few feet away. A hot shower called to her like a lover. She hesitated. Ten minutes, she thought, no more. What difference could this small indulgence make? She quickly stripped off her clothes and dropped them where she stood. Reaching into the glass shower stall, she turned the water on and adjusted the knobs until hot vapors filled the air. The water startled her when she stepped in, the heat nearly unbearable. But she quickly settled into the liquid luxury she’d forgone so long, let the water run hot over every part of her, lifted her breasts to the stream, opened her mouth and took it in, joyously filling her senses.

So enraptured was she that there was no way she could have heard the front door opening.

The morning began with a beautiful sunrise and went sour from there.

Jo had been drinking coffee in the kitchen waiting for toast to pop up when the phone rang.

“Jo. Wally Schanno.”

His voice was beveled with caution, and Jo felt sick to her stomach. “What is it?”

“We-uh-we just got word from the search plane.” He held up a moment, as if he’d come to a big jump he wasn’t sure he could make. “They’ve spotted two bodies.”

“Two bodies.” Jo repeated the words, although she’d heard them well enough. Her mind was trying not to see the image the words conjured. “Do they… know who?”

“Not yet.”

Her throat had closed. She could barely swallow, and when she spoke again, it was in a hoarse whisper. “Are you at the department?”

“Yes.”

“I’ll be right down.”

She hung up and slowly turned. Jenny stood near the refrigerator, her eyes afraid. “Two bodies? Mom, what’s going on?”

“Nothing,” Jo answered automatically. “It’s nothing.”

“Bullshit.”

Rose was in the doorway, listening, too. Jo glanced at her, trying to decide if between them they could dull the cruel, sharp edges of the truth. Rose shook her head.

“Would you get Annie?” Jo asked her sister. “Let Stevie sleep.”

Rose came back with Annie. Annie had a hairbrush in her hand, half her red Irish tangle brushed smooth. She glanced at Jenny and, as if it were contagious, Jenny’s worry appeared on Annie’s face. “What’s going on?”

“Sit down,” Jo said. “Both of you.”

She related the salient events of the past few days, and when she was finished, the girls sat motionless and silent.

“Isn’t there anything someone can do?” Annie finally blurted.

“They’re doing all they can right now,” Jo said.

“Those two bodies?” Jenny asked.

“They don’t know yet. I’m going down to the sheriff’s office now.”

“What can we do?” Annie asked.

“I’m not sure there’s anything we can do.”

“We can pray,” Rose suggested.

Jenny stared at the tabletop. “I’m not going to school.”

“All right,” Jo said.

“Mom?”

“What is it, Annie?”

“Does Dad know there are, like, these other bad guys out there?”

“I don’t know what he knows. But I’ll tell you this: If I were Shiloh, I’d want someone exactly like your dad out there trying to help.”

“I know he’s going to be okay,” Annie said.

“How do you know?” Jenny shot back.

“I just know.”

“Oh, I suppose God talked to you.”

“Shut up.”

“Girls,” Jo said. She took them both in her arms, felt their fear as she held them, and knew it was her fear, as well. “I wish I could say everything’s going to be fine, but nobody knows. Rose is right. Praying is good. Holding on to each other helps, too. We’re a family. We all need to be together in this, okay? We need to be there for one another.” She kissed the tops of their heads. “I have to go to the sheriff’s office. Don’t worry about school today. I’ll let you know as soon as I know something.”

Wally Schanno hadn’t received any additional word when Jo reached his office. The bodies had been spotted on a point of land on a southeast arm of Wilderness Lake. The search plane was going to attempt a landing and investigate. The helicopter, which had one of Schanno’s deputies on board, was proceeding there as well.

“Have you told Agent Harris or Nathan Jackson?” Jo asked.

Schanno said he had.

“I’ll phone the Benedettis.”

Angelo Benedetti took the call. “Where are you?” he asked after she’d explained the situation.

She told him.

His end of the line was quiet. She wasn’t sure if he was waiting for her to say something more. Then he surprised her by asking sincerely, “Are you okay?”

“I’ll be better when I know what’s happened up there.”

“Sure.”

She heard him turn from the phone and speak briefly in response to a voice in the background.

“I’m coming down there,” he said to her.

He showed up fifteen minutes later, was buzzed through the security door, and was escorted to Schanno’s office. Just as Benedetti entered, Deputy Cy Borkmann rushed in behind him. “S-and-R on the air, Sheriff.”