Roy Glenn - All About The Money

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“Shit! Missed that bitch again,” I heard him grumble. My heart was racing as I stood waiting for sounds of his footsteps walking away. Nothing. I was trembling, praying to God Chuck wouldn’t use his key to let himself in, and find me standing there pretending not to be home.

When I thought the coast was clear, I tiptoed back into the bedroom. Things were really going downhill for me and I was at my wit’s end. I knew that I had to come up with a better plan than the one I was workin’.

Later that afternoon, I was ridin’ past the project we used to live in and stopped to pick up a two-piece snack from Fat Larry’s. I don’t know how he does it, but that was by far the best chicken I’ve ever tasted. On the way in, I stopped in my tracks to admire what had to be the prettiest drop- top Beamer I had ever seen. It was sweet-royal blue with baby blue leather and wood panel interior. I mean this car was sparkling in the sunlight and the rims were glistening. A few other people walked by admiring the ride, and I was like damn, will I ever see the day when I can afford shit like that? I sighed and walked up to the entrance. When I pulled the door open, I accidentally bumped into a woman who looked like she belonged in the car.

She was sporting a Baby Phat denim jumpsuit that hugged her curves. She accessorized it with old-school Gucci boots and a matching shoulder bag, with a pair of large designer shades that swallowed nearly half her face, and a Gucci fedora tilted to the side on her head.

“I’m so sorry,” I offered.

“Jada, that you girl?”

I snapped my head toward her hidden face. I didn’t catch the voice, but she definitely knew me. When she snatched off the shades and pulled her hat’s brim back, my mouth dropped. “Diane?”

Diane and I worked together at the marketing company for nearly a year. She rarely showed up to work and, at that time, hadn’t been there at all for a couple of months.

“Yeah, girl! What’s up? I ain’t seen you in a minute!” she said like she was really glad to see me.

I instantly felt self-conscious. There I was dressed in some raggedy jeans and an old sweatshirt that I usually wear when I clean the apartment on weekends.

As Diane spoke, my brain kept trying to understand how one goes from barely coming to work, to being dressed in the finest gear and sporting a look that dripped money. When she pressed the alarm button and that pretty ride beeped, I was too through.

“You okay?” she asked.

I looked at the car then back at her, still dumbfounded. “Um, I ah-” I stuttered, but I was taking in everything fabulous about the new Diane. At five feet seven and one hundred and forty pounds, Diane was beautiful. Her once short hair had been replaced by long wavy and flowing tresses. She blinged from her ears to her neck to her wrists. The chick was iced out, and she looked good. “Ah, Diane, what’s up? I mean, did you hit the number or something?” I needed to know.

She scrunched up her pretty face. “Number? Nah, girl, I ain’t hit no number.” She chuckled.

I looked at the car again and then back at her. This time her eyes followed mine.

“Oh shit!” she started. “Girl, that ain’t nothin’,” she testified, motioning toward the car. “You ain’t gonna make any real money punchin’ no damn clock. I can tell you that much for sure,” she said.

“Well, what do you mean?” I asked her.

She pulled me to the side, closer to her car. “Look, why don’t you go get you soma Fat Larry’s chicken,” she suggested.

I shook my head reluctantly. It was like I didn’t want to leave her for fear that when I came back, she, that car, and my chance to make some real money, might be gone.

“Go on, I’ll wait right here for you,” she promised.

I glanced at her and the car one last time before going inside. When I walked outside and saw Diane sitting behind the wheel of her car, I gladly climbed into her luxury car and leaned back in the passenger seat like I belonged there.

“Are you ready to make some real paper?” she asked.

“Girl, you just don’t know,” I said.

Little did I know what she had in mind would change my life in ways I never imagined possible.

2

I thought about the conversation Diane and I had that day, after we left Fat Larry’s.

“Girl, I swear, I was you about a year ago. You remember, I was sneaking in and out of my cousin’s dorm room, barely able to eat and shit,” Diane shook her head at the awful memories she described. “I just got tired of tryin’ to play it straight,” she admitted.

“Yeah, but the ride-I mean look at you, girl. You’ve got to tell me what you doin’ to get paid like this.”

“It’s simple,” she said. “I dance at this little club called Ecstasy on Friday and Saturday nights,” she said calmly.

I leaned in to her.

“What you mean, you dance at a club? What kind of dancin’ are we talkin’ ’bout here?” I wanted to know.

“I’m an exotic dancer,” she said without so much as a whisper to her voice.

“What?” I screamed.

She didn’t seem the least bit phased by my shock. It was as if we were discussing Larry’s chicken. “Say what you want, but I never leave with any less than five hundred dollars a night,” she said and eased back in her seat. I could sense she was studying my reaction. I let the figure roll around in my head. “I know what you’re thinking,” Diane said.

“No, I don’t think you do.” Had she said five hundred dollars a night? For two nights worth of work she made one thousand dollars? That’s almost triple what I make for working eighty hours.

She pulled her hair behind her ears and leaned toward me. “Yeah, I do, Jada. Your ass thinkin’ ’bout that paper. And you wonderin’ if you can do it.”

I didn’t say anything ’cause she was right.

I just nodded my head and Diane continued, “Look, I’ve been to the club with you plenty of times, Jada. I’ve seen you out there on the floor, shakin’ that ass,” Diane said and started shakin’ in her seat. “You just be shakin’ that ass naked.”

“Naked in front of a room full of men,” I corrected.

“I don’t. I dance for one man,” Diane boasted. “Which ever one is standin’ in front of me with money in his hand.”

“I don’t know, Diane. Dancin’ at a club is one thing-but naked? — I just don’t think I could do that in front of a bunch of horny men.”

“I’m tellin’ you, you could make a grip. You got a bomb ass body too. Them titties and that ass. I’m tellin’ you, girl, you sleepin’ on your best money makers!”

“What, you been sizing me up?”

“Nah, girl, I don’t even get down like that. Well I do, but that’s only for real serious money.” She giggled.

I was used to men commenting about my double-D cups, and I’ve heard one or two joke about my bodacious booty, but it was strange sitting there and listening to Diane do the same.

“I’m telling you, all you doin’ is dancin’,” she persisted.

“Yeah, but you talkin’ about dancin’ naked,” I said, seemingly not able to move past that point. I was just gettin’ to the point where I was comfortable havin’ sex without it being pitch-dark in the room, and that was definitely a huge jump from there. “I don’t know, Diane,” I said and hunched my shoulders.

But there I was, pulling up in front Ecstasy. It was a little building that looked like nothing more than a shack from the outside.

Once the car was in park, I immediately started having second thoughts. You don’t know these people, there could be rapists, murderers or whatever hanging out around here.

I glanced around in both directions hoping no one was paying attention to me as I sat behind the steering wheel of my piece-of-shit car, and tried to summons up enough courage to go inside. I wondered if Diane’s car was parked on the other end somewhere, or maybe even in the back. I would definitely need her there to help me make it through the night.

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