Sidney Sheldon - Chasing Tomorrow

Jean Rizzo glared at Milton Buck but said nothing.

“Speaking of Tracy, where is she?” Buck asked, smiling. “Perhaps you’d like to go and tell your little girlfriend that I’d like a word? Right now, if it’s not too much trouble.”

“She’s gone.”

The smile died on Buck’s lips.

“What do you mean, gone?”

“I mean she left the hospital last night and switched off her phone. I haven’t heard from her since. I went to her hotel this morning but they told me she’d checked out.”

“I don’t believe you. Not even you would be so incompetent as to let a key asset like Whitney slip through your fingers.”

Jean Rizzo shrugged. “I really don’t care what you believe, Agent Buck. And for the record, Tracy isn’t an asset. She’s a friend. If it hadn’t been for her, Jeff Stevens would be dead and Daniel Cooper would still be out there killing women. Check her hotel yourself if you don’t believe me. It’s the Britannia, on—”

“I know where she’s staying, you moron! I’ve had her under surveillance for months.”

“Pity you didn’t pick her up earlier, then, isn’t it?”

Jean walked away, leaving the FBI agent spluttering in his wake.

A FEW MINUTES LATER Jean knocked on the door of Jeff Stevens’s room. When there was no answer, he went inside.

Stevens was heavily tranquilized and sleeping like a baby. He was out of the woods now, according to the doctors, and was expected to make a full recovery. But he hadn’t been fully conscious for more than a few seconds since he was brought in.

Tracy was asleep in a chair next to his bed. She looked so peaceful, Jean felt bad waking her up. But he knew he had to. Shaking her gently by the shoulders, he told her about his exchange with Agent Buck.

“You need to leave here. As soon as possible. Get a flight out of Bulgaria today.”

Tracy looked stricken. “What about Jeff? He hasn’t woken up yet, not truly. He doesn’t even know I was here.”

“I’ll tell him,” Jean said kindly. “When he comes to I’ll need to question him. I’ll tell him everything.”

Tracy hesitated. There were things she needed to tell Jeff. Many, many things. Although she still had no real idea where she should begin.

“If I write a note, will you give it to him?” she asked Jean.

“Of course. But you need to hurry, Tracy. Buck’s not kidding around. If he finds you here, he’ll arrest you.”

Tracy nodded. She had already started to write.

“Where will you go?” asked Jean.

Tracy seemed surprised by the question. “Home, of course. To Nicholas.”

“You can’t stay there, you know,” said Jean. “Buck will find you. He’ll force you to work for him. You need to grab your son and get out. Start again somewhere new, somewhere far away.”

Tracy shook her head. “I can’t do that. Colorado is Nick’s home. I can’t raise my son on the run.”

“But, Tracy . . .”

She smiled, kissing Jean Rizzo on the cheek. “I’ll take my chances. You worry too much, Jean, you know that?”

Three hours later, Tracy was on a plane.

Three days later, Jeff Stevens woke up and read Tracy’s letter.

Three months later, Jeff watched as Dr. Elena Dragova signed his release papers.

“We’ll miss you,” Dr. Dragova told him.

“I’ll miss you too. Especially Sister Katia. You will give her my love?”

The surgeon laughed. “You’re incorrigible. Where will you go? I hope you have someone prepared to take care of you. Or at least to put up with you.”

“I’m going to stay with a friend,” said Jeff. “It turns out we have some unfinished business.”

CHAPTER 30

WE NEED TO TALK, TRACY.”

Jeff gently removed the chopping board from Tracy’s hands and put it to one side.

Tracy sighed. “There’s nothing to say.”

“Oh yes there is. There’s everything to say. We’ve both been too scared to say it, that’s all.”

He was right. Jeff had been staying at the ranch for five days now. Five incredible, precious, magical days. Tracy had introduced him to Nick as an “old friend” from college days and promised dear, patient Blake that she would explain later. It had been wonderful to have Jeff here, and even more wonderful to see how well he got along with Nick. Nick admired and respected Blake Carter. More than that, he loved him. But he shared a sense of humor with Jeff, not to mention a pronounced rebellious streak. The two of them had bonded instantly, giggling away at risqué cartoons like Family Guy like a pair of naughty kids.

The problem was that having “Uncle Jeff” as a houseguest had almost been too easy. It felt so natural and comfortable that neither Tracy nor Jeff had dared to talk about the past, or their feelings. Or, worst of all, the future. Instead they had immersed themselves in the joy of the present, neither one able to let it go and break the spell.

Jeff followed Tracy’s gaze through the window. Nicholas was jumping up onto Blake Carter’s back, trying to knock his Stetson off his head. His blond hair was blowing in the wind and his eyes had crinkled up into tiny slits thanks to the huge smile he was wearing.

Jeff said quietly, “He’s mine, isn’t he?”

Tracy nodded. “Of course he’s yours. There’s never been anyone else.”

“What about Blake?”

She shook her head.

“He obviously loves you, Tracy.”

“I love him too. Just not enough.”

Jeff took her face in his hands, forcing her to look at him. “Tracy, I love you. I always have and I always will. Can’t we try again?”

“Please, Jeff. Don’t.” She started to cry.

“But why not? I know you still love me too.”

“Of course I do!”

“So why . . . ?”

“You know why.” Tracy broke away from him. “Because love isn’t enough. Look at him.” She pointed outside at Nicholas. “Look how happy he is. How stable and secure. I did that. I made that happen. I built a life for him here, Jeff, a life for us, away from all the madness, all the chaos.”

“Yes, you did. And you did an amazing job. But at what cost, Tracy?” Reaching out, Jeff stroked her cheek. Tracy closed her eyes, inhaling the scent of his skin, the agony and the ecstasy. “What about you ? Who you are, what you want? You can’t be a housewife, for God’s sake. You tried it with me and you hated it. You were bored out of your mind, dying a slow death. Can you really tell me you aren’t dying inside, living up here?”

“Sometimes I am,” Tracy was surprised to find herself saying. “Part of me does miss the thrill of our old life, I admit it. But Nicholas comes first. He’s the one totally good thing in my life, Jeff. The one thing I haven’t failed at, I can’t fail at. My mom sacrificed everything for me. She was a wonderful woman.”

“She must have been,” said Jeff. “To have such a perfect daughter.”

Tracy laughed. “Oh no. Not perfect. Very far from perfect.”

“Perfect,” said Jeff. Pulling Tracy close, he kissed her, slowly and with infinite tenderness. It was a kiss they would both remember for the rest of their lives. Neither of them wanted it to end.

“What if I said I’d give it all up for you?” Jeff pleaded, once Tracy finally pulled away. “For us? What if I swore to give up the scams and the capers for good. I did it once. I could do it again.”

Tracy shook her head sadly. “Maybe you could. But then a part of you would die. And I won’t be responsible for that, Jeff. I won’t be the reason.”

“But, Tracy. My darling, you are the reason. You’re the reason for everything. I—”

Tracy put a finger to his lips. “I love you, Jeff. I’ll always love you. But we had our chance at happiness. We had it a long time ago. Now our son has a chance. He has a chance of living a normal, happy life. Don’t deny him that.”