Lillian Braun - The Cat Who Ate Danish Modern

"Bob, this is Qwilleran at the Fluxion," he said.

"Yes, indeed!" said Orax. "How the wires are buzzing this morning! The telephone company may declare an extra dividend." "What have you heard about Dave's murder?" "Nothing worth repeating, alas." "I really called," said Qwilleran, "to ask about Yushi. Do you know if he's available for catering jobs? I'm giving a party for a guy who's getting married." Orax said: "I'm sure Yushi will have plenty of time now that David has departed. He's listed in the phone book under Cuisine Internationale…. Are we going to see you at the Posthumous Pour?" "What's that?" "Oh, didn't you know?" said Orax. "When David wrote his will, he provided for one final cocktail bash for all his friends — at the Toledo! No weeping! Just laughter, dancing and booze until the money runs out. At the Toledo it runs out very fast." "David was a real character," Qwilleran said. "I'd like to write a profile of him for the paper. Who were his best friends? Who could fill me in?" Orax hummed on the line for a few seconds. "The Starkweathers, of course, and the Noytons, and dear Yushi, and quite a few unabashed freeloaders like myself." "Any enemies?" "Perhaps Jacques Boulanger, but these days it's hard to tell an enemy from a friend." "How about the girls in his life?" "Ah, yes, girls," said Orax. "There was Lois Avery, but she married and left town. And there was a creature with long straight hair who works for Mrs. Middy; I've forgotten her name." "I think," said Qwilleran, "I know the one you mean."

Qwilleran took a taxi to the Sorbonne Studio. He had telephoned for an appointment, and a woman with an engaging French accent had invited him to arrive tout de suite if he desired a rendez-vous with Monsieur Boulanger at the atelier.

In the taxi he thought again about Cokey. Now he knew! Koko had sensed her deception. Koko had been trying to convey that information when he nipped Cokey's head and licked the photograph from her wallet.

Qwilleran had caught only a glimpse of the picture, but he was fairly sure whose likeness the cat had licked: that arty pose, that light hair. Now he knew! Cokey — so candid, so disarming — was capable of a convincing kind of duplicity.

She had allowed Qwilleran to introduce David, and the decorator had played the game with only a meager wavering of his sultry gaze. Was he playing the gentleman on a spur-of-the-moment cue? Or was there some prearranged agreement?

If Cokey had deceived Qwilleran once, she had probably deceived him twice. Had she engineered the embarrassment about the Allison house? Did she have connections at the Morning Rampage?

"Is this the place you want?" asked the cabdriver, rousing Qwilleran from his distasteful reverie. The taxi had stopped in front of a pretentious little building, a miniature version of the pavilions that French monarchs built for their mistresses.

The interior of the Sorbonne Studio was an awesome assemblage of creamy white marble, white carpet, white furniture, and crystal chandeliers. The carpet, thick and carved, looked like meringue. Qwilleran stepped on it cautiously.

There was an upholstered hush in the place until a dark-skinned young woman of rare beauty appeared from behind a folding screen and said, "Bonjour, m'sieu. May I 'elp you?" "I have an appointment with Mr. Boulanger," said Qwilleran. "I'm from the Daily Fluxion." "Ah, oui. Monsieur Boulanger is on the telephone with a client, but I will announce your presence." With a sinuous walk she disappeared behind the folding screen, which was mirrored, and Qwilleran caught a reflection of himself looking smugly appreciative at her retreating figure.

In a moment a handsome Negro, wearing a goatee, came striding out from the inner regions. "Hello, there," he said with a smile and an easy manner. "I'm Jack Baker." "I have an appointment with Mr. Boulanger," said Qwilleran.

"I'm your man," said the decorator. "Jacques Boulanger to clients, Jack Baker to my relatives and the press.

Come into my office, s'il vous plait." Qwilleran followed him into a pale-blue room that was plush of carpet, velvety of wall, and dainty of chair. He glanced uneasily at the ceiling, entirely covered with pleated blue silk, gathered in a rosette in the center.

"Man, I know what you're thinking." Baker laughed. "This is a real gone pad. Mais malheureusement, it's what the clients expect. Makes me feel like a jackass, but it's a living." His eyes were filled with merriment that began to put Qwilleran at ease. "How do you like the reception salon? We've just done it over." "I guess it's all right if you like lots of white," said Qwilleran.

"Not white!" Baker gave an exaggerated shudder. "It's called Vichyssoise. It has an undertone of Leek Green." The newsman asked: "Is this the kind of work you do for your customers? We'd like to photograph one of your interiors for Gracious Abodes. I understand you do a lot of interiors in Muggy Swamp." The decorator hesitated. "I don't want to seem uncooperative, vous savez, but my clients don't go for that kind of publicity. And, to be perfectly frank, the designing I do in Muggy Swamp is not, qu'est-ce qu'on dit, newsworthy. I mean it!

My clients are all squares. They like tired cliches. Preferably French cliches, and those are the worst! Now, if I could show you design with imagination and daring. Not so much taste, but more spirit." "Too bad," said Qwilleran. "I was hoping we could get an important society name like Duxbury or Penniman." "I wish I could oblige," said the decorator. "I really do. I dig the newspaper scene. It was an American newsman in Paris who introduced me to my first client — Mrs. Duxbury, as a matter of fact." He laughed joyously. "Would you like to hear the whole mad tale? C'est formidable!" "Go ahead. Mind if I light my pipe?" Baker began his story with obvious relish. "I was born right here in this town, on the wrong side of the wrong side of the tracks, if you know what I mean. Somehow I made college on a scholarship and came out with a Fine Arts degree, which entitled me — ma foi! — to work for a decorating studio, installing drapery hardware. So I saved my pennies and went to Paris, to the Sorbonne. C'est bien ‡a." The decorator's face grew fond." And that's where I was discovered by Mr. and Mrs. Duxbury, a couple of beautiful cats." "Did they know you were from their own city?" "Mais non! For kicks I was speaking English with a French accent, and I had grown this picturesque beard. The Duxburys bought the whole exotic bit — bless them! — and commissioned me to come here and do their thirty-room house in Muggy Swamp. I did it in tones of Oyster, Pistachio, and Apricot. After that, all the other important families wanted the Duxburys' Negro decorator from Paris. I had to continue the French accent, vous savez." "How long have you kept the secret?" "It's no secret any longer, but it would embarrass too many people if we admitted the truth. So we all enjoy the harmless little divertissement. I pretend to be French, and they pretend they don't know I'm not. C'est parfait!" Baker grinned with pleasure as he related it.

The young lady with the ravishing face and figure walked into the office carrying a golden tray. On it were delicate teacups, slices of lemon, a golden teapot.

"This is my niece, Verna," said the decorator.

"Hi!" she said to Qwilleran. "Ready for your fix? Lemon or sugar?" There was no trace of a French accent. She was very American and very young, but she poured from the vermeil teapot with aristocratic grace.

Qwilleran said to Baker, "Who did the decorating in Muggy Swamp before you arrived on the scene?" The decorator gave a twisted smile. "Eh bien, it was Lyke and Starkweather." He waited for Qwilleran's reaction, but the newsman was a veteran at hiding reactions behind his ample moustache.