Lilian Braun - The Cat Who Turned On and Off

He smoked his pipe in silence and wondered about this girl who was disarmingly candid one moment and wary the next — lithe as a willow and strong as an oak — masquerading under an assumed name — absolutely sure of certain details and completely blank about others — alternately compassionate and aloof.

After a while he said, "Are you perfectly satisfied that Andy's death was accidental?" There was no response from the girl — merely an unfathomable stare.

"It might have been suicide." "No!" "It might have been attempted robbery." "Why don't you leave well enough alone?" Mary said, fixing Qwilleran with her wide-eyed gaze. "If rumors start circulating, Junktown is bound to suffer. Do you realize this is the only old neighborhood in town that's been able to keep down crime? Customers still feel safe here, and I want to keep it that way." Then her tone turned bitter. "I'm a fool, of course, for thinking we have a future. The city wants to tear all of this down and build sterile high-rise apartments.

Meanwhile, we're designated as a slum, and the banks refuse to lend money to property owners for improvements." "How about your father?" Qwilleran asked. "Does he subscribe to this official policy?" "He considers it entirely reasonable. You see, no one thinks of Junktown as a community of living people — merely a column of statistics. If they would ring doorbells, they would find respectable foreign families, old couples with no desire to move to the suburbs, small businessmen like Mr. Lombardo — all nationalities, all races, all ages, all types — including a certain trashy element that does no harm. That's the way a city should be — one big hearty stew. But politicians have an a la carte mentality. They refuse to mix the onions and carrots with the tenderloin tips." "Has anyone tried to fight it?" "C.C. has made a few attempts, but what can one man accomplish?" "With your name and your influence, Mary, you could get something done." "Dad would never hear of it! Not for a minute! Do you know how I am classified at the Licensing Bureau? As a junk dealer! The newspapers would have a field day with that item…. Do you see that Chippendale chair near the fireplace? It's priced two thousand dollars! But I'm licensed as Class C junk dealer." "Someone should organize this whole community," Qwilleran said.

"You're undoubtedly right. Junktown has no voice at City Hall." She walked to the bay window. "Look at those refuse receptacles! In every other part of town the rubbish is collected in the rear, but Junktown's alleys are too narrow for the comfort of the city's `disposal engineers, and they require us to put those ugly containers on the sidewalk. Thursday is collection day; this is Saturday, and the rubbish is still there." "The weather has fouled everything up," Qwilleran said.

"You talk like a bureaucrat. Excuses! That's all we hear." Qwilleran had followed her to the window. The street was indeed a sorry sight. "Are you sure Junktown has a low crime rate?" he asked.

"The antique dealers never have any trouble. And I'm not afraid to go out at night, because there are always people of one sort or another walking up and down the street. Some of my rich customers in the suburbs are afraid to drive into their own garages! " The newsman looked at Mary with new respect. Abruptly he said, "Are you free for dinner tonight, by any chance?" "I'm dining with my family," she said with regret. "Mother's birthday. But I appreciate your invitation." Then she took a small silvery object from the drawer of a secretary-desk and slipped it into Qwilleran's hand. "Souvenir of Junktown," she said. "A tape measure. I give them to my customers because they always want to know the height, width, depth, length, diameter, circumference, and thickness of everything they see." Qwilleran glanced toward the rear of the shop. "I notice nobody's bought the Mackintosh coat of arms." He refrained from mentioning that he had dreamed about it. "It's still there, pining for you. I think you were made for each other. When the right customer meets the right antique, something electric happens — like falling in love. I can see sparks between you and that piece of iron." He gave her a quick glance; she was quite serious. He tugged at his moustache, reflecting that one hundred twenty-five dollars would buy him two suits of clothes.

She said, "You don't need to pay for it until after Christmas. Why don't you take it home and enjoy it over the holidays? It's just gathering dust here." "All right!" he said with sudden resolve. "I'll give you a twenty-dollar deposit." He rolled the hoop-shaped coat of arms to the front door.

"Can you manage it alone? Why don't you ask C.C. to help you carry it up to your apartment?" she suggested.

"And don't drop it on your toe," she called out, as Qwilleran struggled down the front steps with his burden.

When he and his acquisition reached the foyer of the Cobb mansion, he stopped to catch his breath, and he heard the ranting voice of C.C. coming from The Junkery.

"You don't know a piece of black walnut from a hole in your head!" Cobb was saying. "Why don't you admit it?" "If that's black walnut, I'll eat my crutch. You're the biggest fake in the business! I'll give you twenty bucks — no more!" Qwilleran wrestled the ironwork up the staircase alone. The cats were asleep in the Morris chair, curled up like Yin and Yang, and Qwilleran did not disturb them. He leaned the coat of arms against the wall and left the apartment, hoping to make three more stops before calling it a day. He had promised to visit Ben's shop, but first he wanted to meet the talkative Sylvia Katzenhide. He liked garrulous subjects; they made his job so easy.

Arriving at The Sorta Camp shop, he held the door open for a well-dressed man who was leaving with a large purchase wrapped in newspaper, black tubes protruding from the wrappings. Inside the shop a woman customer was haggling over the price of a chair made out of automobile tires.

"My dear," Sylvia was telling her, "age and intrinsic value are unimportant. Camp is all wit and whimsy, plus a gentle thumbing of the nose. Either you dig it or you don't, as my son would say." Mrs. Katzenhide was a handsome, well-groomed, self-assured woman who looked forty and was undoubtedly fifty-five. Qwilleran had seen hundreds like her in the women's auxiliary at the art museum, all identical in their well-cut tweed suits, jersey blouses, gold chains, and alligator shoes. This one had added black cotton stockings as the touch of eccentricity that seemed to be necessary in Junktown.

Qwilleran introduced himself and said, "Was I seeing things, or did a man leave this store with a stuffed — " "You're right! A stuffed octopus," said Mrs. Katzenhide. "Hideous thing! I was glad to get rid of it. That was Judge Bennett from Municipal Court. Do you know the judge? He bought the octopus for his wife's Christmas present. She's mad about crawly things." "How come you're dealing in — " "In camp? It was my son's idea. He said I needed a proj ect to keep my mind off myself." She lighted a cigarette.

"Did you know my late husband? He was corporation counsel for the city. My son is in law school…. Excuse me, would you like a cigarette?" Qwilleran declined. "But why camp? Why not something more — " "More genteel? That's what all my friends say. But you have to know something to deal in genuine antiques. Be- sides, my son insists that camp is what the public wants. If anything is unattractive, poorly made, and secondhand, it sells like hot cakes. I really don't understand it." "Then I suppose you didn't buy anything at — " "At the auction yesterday?" The woman had a phenomenal knack for reading minds. "Just a small chandelier for my own apartment. When my husband passed away, I gave up the big house in Lost Lake Hills and moved to Skyline Towers. I have a lovely apartment, and it's not furnished in camp, believe me!" "How do the Junktown dealers regard your specialty? Have you — " "Developed a rapport? Definitely! I go to their association meetings, and we get along beautifully. When I first opened the shop, Andrew Glanz took me under his wing and gave me a lot of valuable advice." She heaved a great sigh.