Dorothy Sayers - The Nine Tailors

“The animals went in two by two,” sang Wimsey, as he sped through the twilight, “the elephant and the kangaroo. Hurrah!”

Down at the sluice, the situation looked dangerous. Barges had been drawn against both sides of the gates and an attempt had been made to buttress the sluice with beams and sandbags, but the piers were bulging dangerously and as fast as material was lowered into the water, it was swept down by the force of the current. The river was foaming over the top of the weir, and from the east, wind and tide were coming up in violent opposition.

“Can’t hold her much longer, now, my lord,” gasped a man, plunging up the bank and shaking the water from him like a wet dog. “She’s going, God help us!”

The sluice-keeper was wringing his hands. “I told ’em, I told ’em! What will become on us?”

“How long now?” asked Wimsey.

“An hour, my lord, if that.”

“You’d better all get away. Have you cars enough?”

“Yes, my lord, thank you.”

Will Thoday came up to him, his face white and working.

“My wife and children — are they safe?”

“Safe as houses, Will. The Rector’s doing wonders. You’d better come back with me.”

“I’ll hang on here till the rest go, my lord, thank you. “But tell them to lose no time.”

Wimsey turned the car back again. In the short time that he had been away the organisation had almost completed itself. Men, women, children and household goods had been packed into the church. It was nearly seven o’clock and the dusk had fallen. The lamps were lit. Soup and tea were being served in the Lady chapel, babies were crying, the churchyard resounded with the forlorn lowing of cattle and the terrified bleating of sheep. Sides of bacon were being carried in, and thirty waggon-loads of hay and corn were ranged under the church wall. In the only clear space amid the confusion the Rector stood behind the rails of the Sanctuary. And over all, the bells tumbled and wrangled, shouting their alarm across the country. Gaude, Sabaoth, John, Jericho, Jubilee, Dimity, Batty Thomas and Tailor Paul — awake! make haste! save yourselves! The deep waters have gone over us! They call with the noise of the cataracts!

Wimsey made his way up to the altar-rails and gave his message. The Rector nodded. “Get the men away quickly,” he said, “tell them they must come at once. Brave lads! I know they hate to give in, but they mustn’t sacrifice themselves uselessly. As you go through the village, tell Miss Snoot to bring the school-children down.” And as Wimsey turned to go, he called anxiously after him—“and don’t let them forget the other two tea-urns!”

* * *

The men were already piling into their waiting cars when Lord Peter again arrived at the sluice. The tide was coming up like a race, and in the froth and flurry of water he could see the barges flung like battering rams against the piers. Somebody shouted: “Get out of it, lads, for your lives!” and was answered by a rending crash. The transverse beams that carried the footway over the weir, rocking and swaying upon the bulging piers, cracked and parted. The river poured over in a tumult to meet the battering force of the tide. There was a cry. A dark figure, stepping hurriedly across the reeling barges, plunged and was gone. Another form dived after it, and a rush was made to the bank. Wimsey, flinging off his coat, hurled himself down to the water’s edge. Somebody caught and held him.

“No good, my lord, they’re gone! My God! did you see that?”

Somebody threw the flare of a headlight across the river. “Caught between the barge and the pier — smashed like egg-shells. Who is it? Johnnie Cross? Who went in after him? Will Thoday? That’s bad, and him a married man. Stand back, my lord. We’ll have no more lives lost. Save yourselves, lads, you can do them no good. Christ! the sluice gates are going. Drive like hell, men, it’s all up!”

Wimsey found himself dragged and hurtled by strong hands to his car. Somebody scrambled in beside him. It was the sluice-keeper, still moaning, “I told ’em, I told ’em!” Another thunderous crash brought down the weir across the Thirty-foot, in a deluge of tossing timbers. Beams and barges were whirled together like straws, and a great spout of water raged over the bank and flung itself across the road. Then the sluice, that held the water back from the Old Wale River, yielded, and the roar of the engines as the cars sped away was lost in the thunder of the meeting and over-riding waters.

* * *

The banks of the Thirty-foot held, but the swollen Wale, receiving the full force of the Upper Waters and the spring tide, gave at every point. Before the cars reached St. Paul, the flood was rising and pursuing them. Wimsey’s car — the last to start — was submerged to the axles. They fled through the dusk, and behind and on their left, the great silver sheet of water spread and spread.

* * *

In the church, the Rector, with the electoral roll-call of the parish in his hand, was numbering his flock. He was robed and stoled, and his anxious old face had taken on a look of great pastoral dignity and serenity.

“Eliza Giddings.”

“Here I am, Rector.”

“Jack Godfrey and his wife and family.”

“All here, sir.”

“Henry Gotobed and his family.”

“All here, sir.”

“Joseph Hinkins… Louisa Hitchcock… Obadiah Holliday… Miss Evelyn Holliday….”

The party from the sluice gathered awkwardly about the door. Wimsey made his way up to where the Rector stood on the chancel steps, and spoke in his ear.

“John Cross and Will Thoday? That is terrible. God rest them, poor, brave fellows. Will you be good enough to tell my wife and ask her to break the sad news to their people? Will went to try and rescue Johnnie? That is just what I should have expected of him. A dear, good fellow in spite of everything.”

Wimsey called Mrs. Venables aside. The Rector’s voice, shaking a little now, went on with his call:

“Jeremiah Johnson and his family… Arthur and Mary Judd… Luke Judson…”

Then came a long, wailing cry from the back of the church:

“Will! Oh, Will! He didn’t want to live! Oh, my poor children — what shall we do?”

Wimsey did not wait to hear any more. He made his way down to the belfry door and climbed the stair to the ringing chamber. The bells were still sounding their frenzied call. He passed the sweating ringers and climbed again — up through the clock-chamber, piled with household goods, and up and on to the bell-chamber itself. As his head rose through the floor, the brazen fury of the bells fell about his ears like the blows from a thousand beating hammers. The whole tower was drenched and drunken with noise. It rocked and reeled with the reeling of the bells, and staggered like a drunken man. Stunned and shaken, Wimsey set his foot on the last ladder.

Half-way up he stopped, clinging desperately with his hands. He was pierced through and buffeted by the clamour. Through the brazen crash and clatter there went one high note, shrill and sustained, that was like a sword in the brain. All the blood of his body seemed to rush to his head, swelling it to bursting-point. He released his hold of the ladder and tried to shut out the uproar with his fingers, but such a sick giddiness overcame him that he swayed, ready to fall. It was not noise — it was brute pain, a grinding, bludgeoning, ran-dan, crazy, intolerable torment. He felt himself screaming, but could not hear his own cry. His ear-drums were cracking; his senses swam away. It was infinitely worse than any roar of heavy artillery. That had beaten and deafened, but this unendurable shrill clangour was a raving madness, an assault of devils. He could move neither forward nor backwards, though his failing wits urged him, “I must get out — I must get out of this.” The belfry heaved and wheeled about him as the bells dipped and swung within the reach of an outstretched hand. Mouth up, mouth down, they brawled with their tongues of bronze, and through it all that shrill, high, sweet, relentless note went stabbing and shivering.