Shona MacLEAN - The Redemption of Alexander Seaton

‘You are a good man, Paul,’ I said, as he untied Gilbert Grant’s horse for me.

‘“Whosoever shall receive this child in my name receiveth me.’” There being no travellers waiting for passage back over the river to Banff, he set to the oars with his three sons and soon the boat was pulling away towards the opposite side of the river.

Sarah Forbes was walking away in the direction of the parish of King Edward. I myself had a call to pay there with packages from Mistress Youngson to the minister’s wife, who was her sister. She had given me to understand that the nondelivery of these packages safely into her sister’s own hands would place in jeopardy my continued residence in the schoolhouse, protest her husband however much he might. Still on foot and leading my horse by the head, I had caught up with the banished girl in less than a minute. I could not just get up on the beast’s back and ride past her. ‘It is Sarah, is it not?’

She glanced at me and then looked ahead of her, blankly. ‘Yes. I think that is well known, today anyway.’ She continued on her way.

‘You are Ishbel’s friend, Ishbel MacGillivray?’

Her face had lightened a little when she turned it towards me again. ‘Yes. Ishbel is my friend. I doubt I will ever see her again, though. And the doctor too, he was good to me. He tried–’ She paused, unsure how to proceed.

‘You must know the doctor is my friend. You are free to speak with me. My name is Alexander Seaton.’

Now at last she smiled, a smile that lifted her face from the ordinary and took something of the wariness from her eyes. ‘I know who you are, sir. Your name is also known.’ She looked down as if she regretted being so open, then said, ‘But Ishbel says you are a good man, and that the doctor thinks well of you.’

‘The doctor thinks better of me than I deserve. He tried to help you, then?’

She nodded. ‘He guessed at my condition two months ago. He spoke up for me before the session and at the council, but it did not sway them. Why should it? I am a fallen woman.’

‘Where will you go now?’

‘I have nowhere to go but my uncle’s house – on the far side of King Edward. If he will take me.’

‘Are you afraid he will not?’

She gave me a dubious smile and then looked down at her belly. ‘He had little enough opinion of me before he sent me to work in Banff, and he will have less now. Anyway, I must get on. The haar is coming in. Goodbye, Mr Seaton.’

I remained motionless by my obedient mount as she walked away and up the track. ‘Wait,’ I called. ‘Please wait.’

She turned around and lowered her head.

‘Sarah …’

‘What do you want from me?’

‘I …’ I did not know the answer. ‘It is a long walk to King Edward. Six miles, maybe.’

‘Not so long. Two hours, or a little more, will take me there. Anyway, I am in no great hurry.’

That I could believe well enough. The condemnation of the citizens of Banff would hardly have faded in her ears before that of her aunt and uncle started.

‘It will be hot when the haar lifts. Much of your journey will be uphill. I am going by King Edward myself.’ I indicated the saddle, broad and worn by many years in the old schoolmaster’s service. ‘If I moved these bags a little, and doubled this blanket, there would be room …’

She looked at me, perplexed, and then laughed out loud, a true laugh of delighted mirth. ‘Mr Seaton, where are your eyes? Have you seen the size of me? The poor beast’s back would break with me up there as well, and you would have to sit on his ears just to make room for me.’

I stood aside from the horse and stepped a little closer to her. ‘You do not understand, Sarah. If you can make yourself comfortable up there, I will walk.’

She parted her lips slightly and drew in her breath as if she was about to say something. She looked up at me for a moment and then looked away as the pale green eyes that had looked blankly out to sea on the ferry threatened to give way to her feelings. She took the hand that I held out and let me lift her up onto the horse.

We passed only one or two people on the road, and they took little notice of us. I thought of her former master George Burnett, the father of her child. I had never liked the man, and neither had my father before me. I remembered my father coming home from meetings of the craft guild and talking of the swagger and the coarseness of George Burnett. But the stonemasons were a powerful guild in Banff, and Burnett the most skilled amongst them.

‘Will George Burnett care for his child?’ It was not unknown for a father to raise a natural son with those of his marriage.

Again she laughed, a different laugh this time. ‘Care for his child? George Burnett is too busy to concern himself with anything so profitless. These last storms have cost him many days’ work, and the fine the session forced from him is more than he thinks me or my baby worth. He should have been much further on with the building of the minister’s new house by now, but the weather has held him up so badly he still has much of the garden ground to clear before he can even complete the foundations. The longer it takes him, the longer he will wait on his payment. My fate is of little interest to him, other than that I should be out of his wife’s sight and cease to cause him inconvenience. He will not acknowledge the child. But I would have it no other way.’ I waited for her to continue, and she did. ‘I arrived in Banff a maiden and no whore. I have left it a maiden no longer, but I am no whore either. While there is breath in my body he will never set a hand on my baby.’ She placed her hand over her belly, and in that moment I knew she would kill to protect her child if she had to. I began to fear a little less for Sarah Forbes.

The rest of our journey passed quietly and we arrived in King Edward without incident. Sarah’s uncle lived on the far side of the parish, where the road dipped then rose again towards Turriff. Mistress Youngson’s sister lived, of course, in the manse beside her husband’s kirk. As we approached the kirkyard gate I sensed the young woman shifting uneasily on the horse’s back.

‘Is there something the matter?’

She smiled, too bright a smile. ‘I am fine, thank you, just fine. But I think maybe it would be better if I walked from here. It would do your name no good to be seen here with me, and you do not deserve to be calumniated for your kindness.’

‘Nor you for your condition. I think, perhaps …’ I hesitated, but she was looking at me intently. ‘I think perhaps, it was not your will that George Burnett should have–’ This was none of my business, but I was too far on now to go back.

She looked away. ‘No, it was not my will.’

‘I am sorry,’ I said.

I reached up to help her down from the beast’s back, but as I set her gently on the ground I – without knowing what I did – let my hands rest a moment at her waist. From the warmth under my fingers I felt the full force of a small kick, a touch from another world. I pulled my hand away as if burnt, then placed it back in wonder. She smiled, a little confused, as I was. I had not known such an intensity of human touch, different, and yet greater than that I had known in my passion for Katharine Hay. I think I would have stood like that a lifetime. The sound of the byre door opening startled me from my reverie, and I managed to step back a pace or two from Sarah Forbes before Mistress Youngson’s sister emerged carrying a pail of freshly taken milk.

Esther Youngson, wife of the minister of King Edward, knew me immediately. Carrying the pail carefully, she walked towards us, smiling, as her sister seldom allowed herself to do. ‘It is Mr Seaton, is it not? And,’ she looked beyond me and put down her pail, ‘Sarah Forbes. Oh, Sarah, my child, so it is true, then.’ Sarah, who had held her head high as she had walked away from the jeers and stones of the mob at Banff could not withstand the tenderness of an old woman who had known her from childhood. She hung her head and wept. Mistress Youngson made her way past me and held the girl for a moment until the crisis subsided. There would be no going to her uncle’s just yet. Carrying the milk and the packages that had brought me here, I followed the two women into the manse.