Alys Clare - The Joys of My Life

‘He must not do so,’ Ninian said vehemently. ‘The Knights of Arcturus are bad men and any deed they do — especially de Loup — cannot help but be tainted. Besides,’ he added with utter confidence, ‘she belongs at Hawkenlye. She wants to be there by the oak tree.’

It was not the moment, Josse thought, to go into why the boy was so sure; even less to ask him just how the figure had communicated her wish. Josse was not sure there was ever going to be a time to ask that.

‘… another ship sailing for Dieppe?’ Ninian was saying.

‘Hmm? Oh, aye — we can sail this afternoon. Small craft down there — ’ he pointed — ‘will set us down in Dieppe late tonight.’ He saw Ninian’s very evident frustration at the delay and, with a brief touch on his arm, added, ‘The wind’s changing, lad. Hadn’t you noticed? It was blowing out of the south-west all morning but it’s gone round to the north. And since Dieppe is virtually due south, we’ll have it filling our sails all the way and we’ll make landfall not long after de Loup.’

As Josse had predicted, the crossing was swift, the sea made choppy by the strengthening wind. Ninian checked frequently on the horses, slung in hammocks under their bellies that kept them level as the ship pitched. Josse was impressed with the boy; whoever had taught him the duties of a squire had done a good job. They made themselves comfortable in a sheltered place amidships, where the motion was less violent, and both of them dozed. Josse had procured food and drink before they sailed and they ate a generous supper before they landed. It would be a long night.

They rode through the night, the north wind that had hastened their crossing at their backs hurrying them on. They stopped before dawn and found a sheltered place in a pine wood, where they slept for several hours. Ninian fed and watered the horses and then they set off again.

They approached Chartres at twilight the following day. For the last few miles of the journey Josse’s senses seemed to have become almost painfully alert. He told himself that it was because they were closing in on Philippe de Loup and what was happening was simply a soldier’s reaction to the approaching fight, but he did not entirely convince himself. Chartres was where he had last seen Joanna. Other than in his dreams and his imagination, she had not returned to the Hawkenlye forest — it appeared that she might never do so — and that suggested that she was still here. He had no idea if she was alive or dead — silently, angrily, he cursed the Domina, who would not or could not explain — but the singing in his blood told him that, in whatever body or form she now inhabited, Joanna was close.

He looked across at Ninian. The boy’s face was grey with exhaustion, although he had not uttered a word of complaint. His determination is strong, Josse thought; he has a precious object to rescue and a death to avenge. I would not, he added silently, wish to be in Philippe de Loup’s shoes.

Did the lad know that his mother had been in Chartres? Josse thought back. Speaking of the forest hut, Ninian had said, she isn’t there any more. I’ve looked and looked and I can’t find her. He had also said he thought she was dead, but swiftly Josse turned his mind away from that. So the boy knew she wasn’t in the forest. It was, however, a long jump to assume he knew she had gone to Chartres. It was a difficult decision, and Josse wondered if he had any right to make it, but in the end he made up his mind. I shall not tell him, he told himself. The lad has enough to worry about in this pursuit of de Loup and what he carries. It would be unfair to burden him with the information that his mother may be close.

Did she know? he wondered suddenly. She had been in the habit of watching her precious, lost son in her scrying ball, even though she had once told Josse ruefully that it gave her a sick, blinding headache that at first had left her fit for nothing for at least a day. So had she done that now? Had she sensed that Ninian was on his way to Chartres, and was she looking out for him? What a reunion it would be, for she had not seen him in the flesh for… Good Lord, it was seven years since she had asked Josse to help her find a place for her son and he had taken the boy to train as a page in Sir Walter Asham’s household.

Without his volition, Josse’s mind wandered back to that time. He too was tired and it seemed that he entered a dreamlike, half-asleep state in which the present faded away, to be replaced by the vivid past. Joanna had conceived Meggie in that cold, hard February. Josse had not known it — he did not meet his child until she was well over a year old — but Joanna had taken up a place in his heart that, whether or not he would ever see her again, would be hers for ever.

‘Josse, we’re coming up to the city walls.’ Ninian’s voice broke into his reverie.

With a disturbing mixture of regret and relief, Josse brought himself back to the present and turned his thoughts to finding somewhere out of the way where he and Ninian could stay.

In the morning, Josse set about enquiring after Philippe de Loup. Again, several men had heard the name and their faces registered varying levels of disapproval and disgust, but nobody had seen him recently.

‘He’s here for a secret purpose,’ Ninian said as he and Josse ate a hasty lunch, ‘so it’s not very likely he’ll be strolling around openly advertising his presence.’

‘You are quite convinced he’s got the figure and intends to place her in the new cathedral?’ Josse asked through a mouthful of bread and dry spiced sausage.

‘Yes,’ said Ninian firmly.

Josse chewed thoughtfully. Then he said, ’Well, he won’t do it in broad daylight. We’d better rest now, lad, so that we’ll be fresh for later.’

Ninian watched him. ‘What are we going to do?’ The excitement in his face suggested that he already knew.

Josse wiped his eating knife and stuck it back in its sheath. ‘We’re going to find a nice little hiding place behind one of those huge pillars and keep watch.’

He heard Ninian’s quiet exclamation. Then the boy said softly, ‘Yes!’

They had found a place to stay in a humble establishment in an area of lodgings huddled out by the town walls. Josse had selected it because it was unobtrusive; he did not want word of his presence reaching de Loup’s ears. To pass the remaining hours of daylight, they returned to their lodgings and Ninian, restless with pent-up energy, set about giving the horses and their gear a thorough refurbishment. Josse found a shady place in the small courtyard and, leaning back comfortably against a hay bale, watched Ninian work until his eyes became heavy and he went to sleep.

They found a tavern and ate supper, then, both wearing dark cloaks, made their careful way to the cathedral. As he had done before, Josse ducked into the shadows and studied the movements of the night watchmen — three of them tonight — until he had recognized a pattern. Then he whispered in Ninian’s ear, ‘Next time the one with the cudgel passes, we slip out behind him and go in there.’ He pointed to the wide space between two buttresses. Ninian nodded. His tension was palpable.

They waited for what seemed like a very long time, but the watchman did not reappear. Neither did either of his colleagues; with a shiver of alarm, Josse wondered why. Had they decided it was a quiet night and, seeing no necessity to maintain their patrolling, retired to huddle around their brazier? Or was it something else…?

The important thing was that they were no longer keeping watch. Josse nudged Ninian and together they raced from the shadowy street, across the open space and into the huge cathedral.

Josse looked around him. Torches blazed in several places, giving sufficient light to illuminate the long nave. He noticed immediately that much work had been done in the time that he had been away. He realized that the gap through which they had just entered was in fact one of the doorways, only as yet there was nothing but a gaping space. Apart from the other entrance, the encircling walls were now complete and in many places already stretched high above his head. In some places the rib stones of the vaults had already begun to creep out along the falsework supporting them. Looking up, Josse was awestruck all over again at the sheer scale of the construction. It was going to be utterly magnificent.