Laura Rowland - The Iris Fan

Reiko glanced up at the ceiling, her habit when he used Bushido to justify his misdeeds. Sano knew that losing his temper was dangerous when he was exhausted and under pressure, but he felt a flare of anger at Reiko. She knew that honor was the most important value in his life, yet she wouldn’t embrace it for his sake because she didn’t care enough about him.

“A wise man knows when to stop beating his head against his wall,” she said.

“Are you calling me stupid?” Sano demanded.

“Just stubborn.”

“And you aren’t?” This trait they shared made it all the harder for them to get along, and it was worsening as they grew older. “I’m stubborn for the sake of justice.”

Reiko gave him a long look that penetrated too deeply. “It’s not only justice you want. It’s revenge on Lord Ienobu.”

“Vengeance is a matter of honor, too. It’s cowardly to let your enemy beat you and not fight back.”

“Vengeance can hurt you more than your enemy! It almost got you killed last night!”

“I’m alive to fight another day,” Sano said, folding his arms. “That’s how it goes.”

“According to Bushido?” Reiko said, “You’re investigating Yoshisato’s murder after the shogun told you to stop. That’s a violation of Bushido, which says you have to obey your lord.”

“I’m disobeying it for the shogun’s own sake, to prevent his murdering nephew from inheriting the regime! It’s my duty as a samurai to go against my lord when my lord is going the wrong way.”

“Then why not break the rule about justice and vengeance, too? Why should you be able to choose which rules to follow and which to break?”

Her logic was sound, but honor didn’t always obey logic. “There’s no use my trying to explain,” Sano said. “You refuse to understand.”

“I don’t understand why you had to report Hirata. He hasn’t done anything wrong. You could have given him a chance to shut down his secret society instead of making him a fugitive and his family outcasts.”

She never confined an argument to one subject; she dragged in all his offenses. Sano’s anger flared hotter, stoked by the frustration of unsatisfied desire. “Don’t bring that up again!”

“Of course, you don’t have to live with Midori and the children and their misery every day,” Reiko said, angry, too. “You’re hardly ever home.” She shook her head, realizing the argument had gotten off track. “What’s the use fighting Lord Ienobu? You never win.”

“There’s obviously no use expecting you to give me another chance,” Sano snapped.

“Why take another chance? The shogun doesn’t care about justice for Yoshisato. Let the fool leave the regime to Lord Ienobu, the traitor who murdered his heir. It’s what he deserves.”

“Don’t talk about the shogun like that!” Sano was horrified to hear someone criticize his lord even though he knew exactly what the shogun was.

“You’re trying to do him a service he doesn’t want, and it’s only hurting us. Haven’t we suffered enough?” Reiko spread her arms.

The gesture encompassed their cold, shabby house and her thin body. The memory of their dead child occupied the space between them like a cruel apparition. Sano supposed he’d never grieved the loss as keenly as Reiko. He hadn’t carried the child in his body or been present when it was stillborn. It had never seemed as real to him as his other children. He felt guilty for that as well as because she’d lost the baby while trying to save his life.

“It’s because we’ve suffered that I’m so determined to get Lord Ienobu.” Sano wanted desperately to make it up to Reiko, and this was the only way he knew how. “He set the events in motion that caused…” Sano couldn’t say “our baby’s death.” They didn’t talk about the baby; it was too painful.

Tears glittered in Reiko’s eyes. “Don’t make your vendetta about that. You can’t change anything that’s happened. You’ll only cause more trouble for us.”

“It’s not just about honor,” Sano said. “It’s about survival now.”

“You knew four years ago that it could come to that. If you’d quit then, we wouldn’t be in this spot. And it’s not too late for you to change.”

Sano felt the rift in their marriage widen. He fervently wished they could be as they’d once been-united, facing peril together. He loved Reiko so much that he wanted to blurt it out, but she must hate him so much that if he did, she would laugh. Would they ever find their way back to each other? It seemed impossible.

In the adjacent room, the children fretted; Midori’s anxious voice soothed them. Reiko drew a shaky breath, made an effort to calm herself for their sake. “Detective Marume said the shogun was stabbed.” She spoke as if she thought this was a safer, neutral topic. “Will you tell me what happened?”

It was as safe as an axe hanging over his head, but Sano mustn’t keep any more secrets from her. He told her about the unseen attacker. “The shogun’s wounds are serious. The doctor says it’s too soon to know if he’ll survive.”

Clasping her heart, her eyes stricken, Reiko said, “Merciful gods.”

“There’s good news,” Sano said, delaying the inevitable while he tamped down his emotions. Their argument was about to move on to even more hazardous ground, and unless he controlled himself, he would say or do something irreparably destructive. “The shogun brought me, and Masahiro, back to court. I’m chief investigator again and Masahiro is my assistant.”

Reiko brightened, then frowned, suspicious. “But why … how…?”

Bracing himself for the axe to drop, Sano said, “I’m going to investigate the attack.”

* * *

Reiko intuited what had really happened. “You mean, you volunteered?”

“Yes,” Sano admitted.

She tried to see it from Sano’s point of view instead of getting angry that he’d stepped right in the middle of another dangerous investigation. He was an experienced detective; it was his duty to find out who stabbed the shogun. She couldn’t help thinking, He never learns! The discomfort in his manner told her there was even more to the story that she wasn’t going to like.

“But you’ve been out of favor for four years. Why would the shogun change his mind about you all of a sudden?”

“I talked him into it. With help from Yanagisawa.”

Reiko was surprised that their enemy would lift a finger for Sano except to cut his throat, and even more disturbed to learn that Sano had gotten mixed up with Yanagisawa again. That surely meant more trouble, and she smelled Sano’s motive for volunteering to investigate the crime. “Don’t tell me: Lord Ienobu is a suspect. You think he’s responsible for the attack on the shogun.”

“He has the best motive,” Sano said, defensive. “If the shogun dies, he inherits the dictatorship.”

Reiko’s anger flared again. “You’re using the investigation to start up a new battle with Lord Ienobu! I don’t believe it!” She shook her head as she thought of the demotions, the effect on the children, and the constant fear that next time Lord Ienobu retaliated, it would be death for the whole family.

“This is my new chance to prove that Lord Ienobu is guilty of treason and take him down,” Sano said. “That’s the only way to protect us.”

“And if you can’t?”

Sano beheld her with reproach. “Why are you assuming I’ll fail?”

“After four years you still can’t convict Lord Ienobu of killing the shogun’s daughter and son. Why do you think you’ll succeed this time?”

Sano studied her as if she were a puzzling stranger. “There was a time when you would have jumped at this opportunity, no matter the risks.”