Alys Clare: Out of the Dawn Light

Then I stepped on to the red-hot coals.

Walk quickly but do not run, Hrype had instructed. Keep up a steady pace. Look ahead.

His words echoed loud and strong in my ears. One pace, two, three. The coals were very, very hot and I could feel their threat. But my ice boots protected me. Your feet are pleasantly cool , I heard Edild say calmly inside my head. Take your time for you will not be hurt.

Four steps. Five.

I was still staring straight ahead but out of the corners of my eyes I could see Hrype and Edild. It was odd because although of course I recognized them, sometimes they did not look like themselves. Or, rather, they did but at the same time they looked quite different and I could have sworn that a silver fox paced on my right and a great brown bear padded on silent paws to my left.

I felt so safe, so secure, that I knew it was going to be all right.

Six steps, seven, eight, then, quickly now, nine, ten, eleven and twelve, then one foot was out of the pit and then the other, the fresh grass cool and welcome.

There was a stunned silence — I had been aware as I walked the fire pit that nobody was making a sound — and then a great roar rose up. Edild and Hrype stood panting either side of me, both of them drenched in sweat; Hrype had bluish cords standing out on his temple and neck. I spun my head this way and that, trying to see what was happening, trying to look in every direction at once, but then suddenly I was dumped down on my bottom on the grass and Edild was plunging my feet into very, very cold water that smelt of lavender.

She must have only recently fetched the water from the well, for the chill bit as the fire had not done and I cried, ‘Ouch! That’s cold !’

She did not hear, or if she did she gave no sign. One by one she raised my feet out of the icy water, closely inspecting each one before plunging it back again. She did this three times and I saw a slow smile of satisfaction spread over her face. I was the only one who could see, however, since she was bent over me, her face hidden. Then Hrype was there too, and wordlessly she lifted up my feet once more and showed him.

His smile was wide and triumphant. They looked at each other for a long moment and almost imperceptibly she nodded.

He stood up.

Lord Gilbert was elbowing his way through the throng, pushing open-mouthed, avid-faced villages out of the way in his fervour. ‘Well?’ he cried. ‘ Well? Is she all right? Is she burned? What has happened?’

He saw Edild’s tranquil face and a grin twitched at his mouth.

‘See for yourself,’ Edild said. She lifted my feet up to show him and I was tipped over inelegantly on to my back, struggling to hold down my skirt to preserve what was left of my modesty.

He stared, shook his head in disbelief and stared again. The grin now splitting his face like a slice out of an apple, he called out, ‘There is no need for bandages or priestly inspection after the prescribed three days, for Lassair has taken no injury !’ The last words were delivered at the top of his voice. Then, in a far more controlled tone, he said, ‘I declare that, by virtue of the trial by ordeal, Lassair of Aelf Fen has proved that she tells the truth. God has protected her,’ he pronounced gravely.

I felt like throwing back my head and crowing. I felt like getting to my cold but unblemished feet and dancing. I turned to look for Baudouin de la Flèche, already edging his way quickly to the rear of the crowd, and I screamed, ‘ Yaaaaa! ’

It was pretty meaningless but it seemed to sum up what I was feeling. I saw him scowl at me with furious malice, then he spun round and hurried away.

Lord Gilbert, as if he had suddenly recalled the reason why we were all gathered there, was looking grave. He glanced after Baudouin de la Flèche, a frown creasing the puffy flesh of his forehead, then looked back at me. ‘It has indeed been demonstrated without doubt that you have God’s protection, and therefore we know that you speak true when you say Sibert is no murderer,’ he said. Then, with a sigh, he added, ‘The man Sagar, produced by Baudouin de la Flèche as witness, must be mistaken.’ His frown deepened; clearly he was thinking hard. Then he turned to the captain of his guard and said simply, ‘Go and release Sibert. The charge against him is dropped.’

The guard hurried away. I looked around for Hrype, a happy smile on my face, for surely he would hasten to go with the guards to welcome Sibert back into the world and I wanted to share the moment with him. He wasn’t there; I guessed he had foreseen Sibert’s release and had already gone.

The men who had led me out to the pit had all stepped back as if, out of embarrassment, they were distancing themselves from someone who had been treated like a criminal and had just proved, in quite spectacular fashion, that she was nothing of the sort.

I stood alone, for Edild too had melted away. There was no time to wonder where she’d gone because all at once my mother was pushing her way through the awestruck, chattering villagers, my father, my granny and my siblings hard on her heels, and I leapt up and threw myself into her arms.

‘I’m all right!’ I cried, laughing and crying at the same time. ‘ I’m all right! I proved I was telling the truth and Sibert’s going to be freed!’

‘ I know! ’ she sobbed, her hug fierce and strong. Then, shaking me so hard that my teeth clattered together, she cried, ‘Oh, Lassair, Lassair, don’t you ever do anything like that again!’

In a joyful, overwhelmingly relieved band, laughing, chattering, we made our way back to our house. I was skipping along hand in hand with Elfritha and Haward, both of them clutching on to me as if I was about to be wrenched away from them to face an even worse ordeal, when Edild caught up with us.

‘You feel no pain?’ she asked.

‘None!’ I cried jubilantly. ‘I could dance all night!’

She smiled briefly. I realized she looked exhausted. I detached myself from my brother and sister, saying I’d follow along presently, then stopped and faced my aunt.

‘Thank you,’ I said quietly. ‘I don’t know exactly what you and Hrype were doing as I walked the coals, but I do understand that I couldn’t have done it without you.’

Her smile widened. ‘Yes you could, Lassair. You believed in yourself and you did as you were told.’

Slowly I shook my head. ‘You did something ,’ I insisted. ‘Something that exhausted the pair of you and made you sweat as if you’d just run a mile over rough country. And,’ I added, lowering my voice as I remembered, ‘it wasn’t just you — I thought I saw your guides. Yours was a silver fox and Hrype’s was a bear.’

For an instant her eyes widened and she muttered something, then her expression cleared and she said mildly, ‘I don’t think so, Lassair. It was probably just the excitement and the stress of the challenge.’

I held her eyes and I thought she sent me a silent message. I thought she said, You are right but these things are not to be spoken of.

I nodded, just once. Then she took my arm and we hurried after the others.

The next joy was when Hrype and Froya arrived, because walking between them, grinning sheepishly, was Sibert. He was still pale but he looked very different from the last time I’d seen him, in Lord Gilbert’s hall. Hrype must have taken him home as soon as he had been released and he’d had a wash — his fair hair was still wet — and changed his clothes. There were neat bandages on his wrists and ankles where the iron shackles had bitten into his flesh.

We all gave him a great welcome. My father had tapped a barrel of the best beer and we were rapidly making our way through it, so that already we were tipsy and loud. Sibert accepted congratulations modestly, his head lowered, and in time he made his way to me.