Ann Cleeves - A Lesson in Dying

‘Yet she never told Matthew about you.’

‘That was her husband’s fault,’ she said. ‘When the children were young they were close to her adoptive parents. He’d never let her tell them the truth. He said it would confuse them. When he left her she didn’t want to admit that she’d lied. She did persuade Matthew to apply for the job at Heppleburn. That was kind. As it turned out it was just as well Matthew never knew I was his grandmother. It was difficult enough for him at Heppleburn without Medburn knowing he was a relative of mine.’

Jack sat in a large, comfortable armchair. He felt as if he were slipping into sleep. Miss Hunt held the gun lightly across her lap and he was almost too tired to care if she used it or not. But he did want to know what had happened and it occurred to him that the longer he could persuade her to keep talking, the more chance there was that he would survive.

‘Why did you kill Medburn?’ he asked.

‘Because of Matthew, of course,’ she said fiercely. ‘The headmaster had been tormenting me for years, but that was different. I love Matthew. He’s the only relative I’ve had to care for. He had to be protected.’

Her voice was high-pitched and wild and he wondered why none of them had realized before how desperate she was. He supposed they were so used to her that they took her for granted. They did not look behind the formal, authoritarian exterior. And she was convinced that her action was justified. She had no cause to show fear or remorse.

‘You killed Medburn because he was going to sack Matthew?’

She nodded.

‘He told me on the day of the Harvest Festival,’ she said. ‘Do you remember? It was the day of the Parents’Association committee meeting when your daughter suggested that we had the Hallowe’en party. I thought: if only I were a witch. I’d shape a spell and make him disappear for ever. Then I decided I’d kill him anyway. It wasn’t as if he was worth anything. He had no intrinsic value. He was an ugly little man. I couldn’t see anything wrong in it.’

She was rambling and Jack looked at the gun, wondering whether she might forget it and allow it to slip from her knee to the floor.

‘I enjoyed getting the details right,’ she said. ‘I told you, didn’t I, that I had ambitions to be a theatre designer until my parents sent me north in disgrace? I designed it like a stage act. Anne’s father was an actor…’ She stopped, lost in thought, then continued. ‘It took me longer than I expected to carry Medburn to the small playground. He was heavier than he looked.’ She seemed lost in memory and the gun began to slide between her knees towards the floor, but she caught it and held it firmly. She leaned forward and talked earnestly. ‘I had to plan it all,’ she said, ‘in every detail. It wasn’t easy, you know.’

She looked up at him as if she expected approval.

‘I knew about the Heminevrin,’ she went on, ‘ because the old lady’s daughter complained to me once that she couldn’t get her to take it. “ The doctor says it’ll stop her wandering around at night,” she said, “but she just spits it out because it tastes so bad. You’d think they could put something in it to make it taste better.” I didn’t think that would matter with Medburn because everyone knew he had no sense of taste, but even he noticed it. “This coffee isn’t up to your normal standard, Miss Hunt,” he said, being as pompous as ever, but he drank it all the same.’

‘You must have phoned him,’ Jack said, determined to maintain the conversation. ‘I suppose you asked him to come back to school. How did you manage that?’

‘I said I had a message from Angela Brayshaw,’ she said. ‘He thought he’d kept that affair secret, but everyone could tell how infatuated he was with her. He came rushing round to school like a little boy in love. I had the coffee ready, with the drug in his mug. I told him that Angela had arranged to come back to school early, so they could have some time together before the party started. He looked so pleased with himself, so smug. I pretended to leave and sat in my classroom to wait. When I went back to the hall a quarter of an hour later he was unconscious. I strangled him, then dragged him into the small playground and strung him up on the netball hoop. I had the noose ready. I was pleased with the result. He looked very…? dramatic hanging there. It was most appropriate for Hallowe’en. All the time I was working I was conscious that someone might come and surprise me.’ She stopped and looked directly at him. ‘ It was exciting,’ she said. ‘I have never been so excited in my life. I wanted to humiliate him as he had humiliated me.’

‘You were clever,’ Jack said. ‘ I would have said that you were as surprised as the rest of us when I found his body.’

‘Yes,’ she said. ‘I would never have thought myself capable of it. I was pleased with myself. My boyfriend would have been proud of me.’

‘It must have been a bit of a shock when I turned up to talk to you,’ Jack said. He felt he was entitled to be proud of himself too.

‘It was,’ she said. ‘I didn’t think anyone would find out about Anne, but I still thought I was safe…’

She stood up suddenly, in a jerk, as if she had heard a noise outside, and walked to the window. She peered through the curtains then returned to her chair.

‘Why did you kill Paul Wilcox then?’ he asked. He took a cigarette from his pocket and lit it. It seemed unimportant now that he might offend her. ‘If you thought you were safe.’

She obviously disliked the implied criticism.

‘Perhaps I was too clever when I followed you to the school house on the night of the bonfire,’ she admitted. ‘ I felt helpless. I didn’t know how far you’d got with your investigation. I hoped to frighten you.’

‘You just made me more determined,’ he said.

‘Yes. I realize that.’

‘Paul Wilcox was already in the school house looking for some letters he’d sent to Angela Brayshaw. He saw you, didn’t he?’

‘Yes,’ she said. ‘He was looking out of the upstairs window and he saw me in the moonlight. He seemed too frightened then to realize the implication of it, but I was worried he’d see how important it was later. I never planned to kill him. It was quite spontaneous. I was on my way to Matthew’s and I saw Wilcox come out of the old mill and walk up the lane. I turned the car round and followed him. Just as I reached him it started to rain very heavily. I saw that as fate. I stopped the car beside him. “ Get in,” I said. “ I’ll give you a lift home.” He didn’t suspect anything. I always thought he was a fool. Then I saw him sitting there, starting to wonder. “What were you doing at the school house on the night of the bonfire?” he asked. “It was you I saw in the playground.” So I had to kill him. I took my scarf and twisted it round his neck as he was turning to get out of the car. It was easy then to tip him into the ditch.’

‘Wilcox had a wife and two children,’ Jack said.

‘He was weak and silly,’ she said quickly. ‘I couldn’t let him get in the way.’

She’s like a selfish child, he thought, determined to get her own way at any price.

‘And what about me?’ he cried. ‘ What excuse do you have for getting rid of me.’

‘You were warned,’ she said. ‘ It was your choice.’ She looked quite different, hunched over the gun, her knees wide apart like one of the incontinent old ladies at Burnside. She had lost her control and dignity. Her protective passion for Matthew had destroyed her.

‘Don’t you think they’ll realize you’re the murderer if they find my body here?’

‘Do you think I’m a fool?’ The words exploded from her and she was so angry and unbalanced that he was afraid she would shoot him immediately. ‘No one knows where you are. They think you’ve run away because you were depressed by Kitty’s death. So depressed that you might commit suicide yourself.’