Содзи Симада - Murder in the Crooked House

“Right. They’re not.”

“And yet, if we drop the theory that Sasaki was the killer and look at who’s left, there are the three members of staff and then the daughter, Eiko, Kumi Aikura, the Kanais, Yoshihiko and finally Togai. That’s it. There doesn’t seem to be anyone among them who might have a grudge against Hamamoto.”

“No, nobody.”

“And really when you think about it, the act of murdering Sasaki can hardly be said to exact revenge on Hamamoto.”

“I agree.”

“Unless of course because, as there was some sort of relationship between Eiko and Sasaki, the act of killing Sasaki would cause grief to the daughter, and therefore also grief to the father by association. A bit of a roundabout way to achieve it though.

“It’s such an impossible case! Starting with that horrible grinning doll, it has so many weird elements. Like those two stakes stuck in the snow—”

At that moment the library door opened to reveal Eiko Hamamoto and Kumi Aikura. At first the two women appeared perfectly calm as they strolled over to the window, but if you looked more closely you could see there was some kind of simmering tension between them. They didn’t seemed to notice the two of us.

“You’re really going for it,” said Eiko, as nonchalant as if she were talking about the weather.

“What do you mean?” asked Kumi carefully. I was wondering the same thing. But Eiko’s next response made it clear. She was referring to the other woman’s pursuit of Sasaki, Togai, Kajiwara and the other men.

“There’s no point in beating about the bush,” said Eiko with a sweet smile. “I think you understand what I’m talking about?”

Eiko’s condescending attitude never faltered.

“I’m sorry, no. I have absolutely no idea what you’re talking about,” Kumi answered loftily.

I held my breath.

“Look, I can forgive you everything else. Perhaps you can’t help that you’re such an irresponsible fluffhead. I’m just different, that’s all. I can’t live the way you do. But what I can’t forgive you for is Sasaki. Do you understand?”

“What do you mean by ‘irresponsible fluffhead’? You say you can’t live the way I do, but you certainly seem to know a lot about that way.”

“So you refuse to answer my question?”

“I’m the one asking you a question.”

“Look, it would be better for you just to admit it. Or do I need to spell out your relationship with President Kikuoka as his so-called secretary?”

Kumi couldn’t come up with a response right away. There was a moment of chilling silence.

“What the hell do you mean by you can’t forgive me for Sasaki?”

Kumi’s composure was gone. She didn’t have the energy any more to feign politeness.

“Oh, I think you know.” Eiko’s voice turned dangerously soft. “How you employed that professional box of tricks of yours to seduce that innocent young man.”

“Just a minute! ‘Professional box of tricks’?”

“Isn’t sleeping with men your profession?”

Kumi was sensible enough not to lose it at this point. She was clearly fighting back the urge to yell something. Instead, she laughed defiantly.

“Now you mention it, I did notice you throwing yourself at Sasaki’s stretcher. Kind of embarrassing, really. Reminded me of a bar girl fawning all over her patron. Very impressive.”

It was Eiko’s turn to be lost for words.

“But that’s the irony, isn’t it? You forbid other women to go near your darling Sasaki, but you never even slept with him? What century are you from? You’ll never get anywhere with that kind of thinking. If you thought of him as your man, why didn’t you just put a leash on him?”

Both women were on the point of exploding in fury. Kiyoshi and I felt in physical danger. We were on the point of getting up and running for our lives, but Eiko’s pride stopped her from going too far.

“It’s impossible to keep my dignity around someone like you.”

Kumi laughed scornfully.

“You call yourself dignified? Try losing a bit of weight. That’d give you more dignity.”

Eiko took her time before responding.

“I’m going to ask you straight. Was it you who killed Sasaki?”

Kumi was dumbfounded.

“What the…?”

The two women glared at each other.

“Are you crazy? How could I have killed Sasaki? What motive could I have had?”

“I don’t know how, but I know you had a motive.”

“What?”

“To stop me getting him.”

Kumi laughed again, this time more shrilly. But her eyes didn’t join in. They stayed fully focused on Eiko’s face and showed no sign of amusement.

“Please stop making me laugh! Why would you imagine I’d need to kill Sasaki? I liked him, but he was madly in love with you? Is that it? Oh, that’s priceless! I didn’t care about him at all, and he didn’t care about you at all either. Why would I want to kill him? In fact, the one who might want to kill him is you! Isn’t that right? Because he was attracted to me.”

“Don’t talk rubbish.”

Finally, the situation had reached its most frightening point.

“I can’t believe a dirty whore like you would even dare to set foot in this house. Get out! Get out of my house now!”

“Believe me, there’s nothing I’d like better. If only I could get permission from the police to leave. I’ve had more than enough of this house with its serial murders and a woman constantly stomping around like a sumo wrestler. And that hideous piercing voice.”

For quite a time after that the two women exchanged a barrage of insults that I couldn’t possibly write down here. Kiyoshi and I kept perfectly still and tried to merge into the scenery.

Eventually, the door was slammed so hard the whole wall shook, and Eiko was left alone. For a while she stood there shell-shocked, but then finally summoned the presence of mind to scan the room. And, of course, her eye fell upon the two accidental spectators. The blood drained from her face and her lips began to tremble.

“Good afternoon,” said Kiyoshi boldly.

“Have you been there the whole time?”

She seemed to be feigning calm, even as she knew the answer to her question. Or perhaps she really did think that we had somehow crept in through the window while she’d been engaged in her battle.

“Could you not have let me know you were there?”

“Well, we… we were too afraid to say anything.”

This was not the sensible thing to say on the part of Kiyoshi, but we were lucky. Eiko barely seemed to lose her cool at all. It was almost as if she hadn’t understood Kiyoshi’s meaning.

“It’s quite unforgivable that you didn’t say a thing. So you just sat there and listened?”

Kiyoshi glanced at me as if to say, Don’t just sit there. Help me out.

“We didn’t mean to listen,” he said.

“But we were worried,” I said, ignoring Kiyoshi.

“Yes, about the outcome,” Kiyoshi quickly added.

“The outcome? What did you think might happen?” she snapped.

My shoulders began to tremble.

“Why were you lurking there listening to our conversation?”

Privately I objected to the word “conversation”.

But Eiko’s voice was getting shriller. I was frantically preparing a pretty good excuse that I hoped might help to improve the atmosphere in the room. I felt confident that I could do something. Had I been alone, I might have succeeded.

But it’s no good when your friend has no common sense whatsoever. Right then the man sitting next to me decided to say the most inappropriate thing that any human being could possibly have come up with, negating all of the effort that I’d made up to that point.

“So… which one of you do you think won?”