Ed Gorman - Short Stories, Volume 1

“God, does my head hurt.”

“Sorry.”

“And my shin.”

“Sorry about that, too.”

“You really get off on slapping people around?”

“Sometimes.”

“That seems weird to me, hurting people I mean. I’m always trying to help people, you know what I mean?”

“Yeah, like you helped Carson’s father-in-law.”

“That was the only time I ever did anything like that.” He sounded as if Favor had deeply hurt him by reminding him of the incident.

Footsteps in the hallway. Coming this way.

“You going to hide?” Evans whispered.

“Huh-uh,” Favor whispered back. “Just go open the door.”

The footsteps came closer. Evans looked scared. Favor waved him to the door with the .38. “When he knocks, open the door and then step back and let him walk inside.”

When the knock came, Evans looked back at Favor. Favor nodded. David Carson was framed in the doorway. He was a lanky, impressive middle-aged man. He looked very unhappy.

“What the hell is this, Evans?”

Evans stepped aside so Carson could get a look at Favor.

“C’mon in, Carson,” Favor said.

“Who the hell are you?”

“Just get your ass in here.” Favor liked pushing people like Carson around. For once, it was Carson’s turn to be the pushee.

“He knows,” Evans said.

“Oh, isn’t that just fucking ducky?” Carson said. He walked into the living room. “How’d he find out?” Carson said to Evans.

“I told him.”

“Figures. You dumb bastard.” Carson looked at Favor. “You’re not getting jack shit from me. You’d better understand that right up front. No more for Evans, and none at all for you.”

Favor decided now was probably a good time to get out of the recliner.

“You killed your father-in-law,” Favor said.

“What I did is my own business.” Carson’s tone made it clear that he never explained himself to peons.

“You ever think how your wife might feel about that?”

“Say,” Carson said, snapping his fingers. “Favor. Now I know who you are. Your father used to be the old man’s groundskeeper or something like that.”

“I liked the old man,” Favor said, “a lot more than you did, apparently.”

Carson looked at him and smiled. “When’s the last time you talked to her? To Jane.”

“A while ago. Why?”

“Go down and get her,” Carson said to Evans. Evans looked baffled. “My wife,” Carson said. “In my car.”

“What the hell’re you trying to pull here, anyway?” Favor said.

“Go get her, Evans,” Carson said. “I picked her up on the way over here.”

Evans looked at Favor for approval. Favor nodded. “Right back,” Evans said.

“You gullible bastard,” Carson said after Evans was gone.

“You’re one of these guys who has a life-time crush on my wife, aren’t you? She told me how you used to write her letters sometimes.”

Favor felt his face redden.

“She may not be what you think,” Carson said. He was smiling again. Smirking, actually. “You’re some kind of investigator, right?” Carson said. “What’d she do, hire you to follow me around or something? That how you got into this? Stupid bitch.”

The name-calling stunned him. How dare anybody call Princess Jane a name. My God, this guy must be insane. Favor was about to say something when Jane came through the door. She wore a camel-colored suede car coat, a starched white shirt, black slacks and a pair of black flats. She was, as always, gorgeous.

“I’m sorry for all this, Favor,” she said.

Favor looked at Carson. “She knows what you did. To her father.”

Favor expected a big scene. All that happened was Jane looked at Carson. “I need to talk with Favor alone,” she said.

“Why the hell’d you have him following me around?” Carson said. If Carson had called her a name, Favor was prepared to slug him.

“Because I didn’t know what was going on,” she said. “You were acting so strange. I thought maybe you had a woman on the side.”

“So you hire this creep?” Carson said.

“He isn’t a creep, and I want to talk to him alone. Why don’t you and Mr. Evans go outside for a while?”

Carson glared at him, then nodded for Evans to follow him out. Carson slammed the door behind him good and hard.

Jane said, “I really appreciate everything you’ve done for me, Favor. And I do want to pay you.”

“You know better than that.” Then: “I know some good divorce lawyers.”

Jane smiled sadly. “I love him, Favor. We have two children together.”

“He murdered your father.”

“We talked about that, on the way over here. I told him what I knew and we talked about it.” She reached out and took his hand. “This isn’t a very pretty thing to say about myself, Favor, but it’s true. I’m used to living a very lavish lifestyle. That’s the first thing David said to me after I told him that I knew what he and Evans had done to my father. He said, ‘I did it for the sake of our family. If I hadn’t, we’d be broke today. He was dying anyway, he didn’t have long to go. The company needed that key-man insurance payoff.’ That’s what he said, and you know, he’s right.”

“Oh, shit,” Favor said. “You mean you don’t mind he killed your father?”

She leaned forward on her tip-toes and kissed him on the cheek. “I knew you’d be disappointed in me.”

“He killed your father. In cold blood.”

“He saved our family. Me. The girls. Himself. He didn’t have any choice. Daddy was dying anyway, don’t forget.” Done kissing him, she leaned back and said, “My father would have done the same thing in David’s circumstances. They’re the same kind of man, really. I’m sure that, sub-consciously, I knew. That’s why I married him.”

“I should go the police.”

“You’d destroy my life, Favor. Do you really want to do that?”

He looked at her. She was a stranger suddenly. “I guess not.”

“I knew you’d say that. I said that to David on the way over here. I said Favor’s an honorable man. He wouldn’t let me be hurt that way.”

This time, she kissed him on the lips, quickly but with real tenderness. “We just come from different backgrounds, Favor,” she said. “I guess I can’t expect you to understand me sometimes.” She looked back at the closed door.

“Now I’d better go.”

“Yeah. I guess you’d better.”

“I know you’re disappointed, Favor. And I’m sorry.”

“Sure.”

“Goodbye, Favor.”

“Yeah.”

“I’ll always remember you. Really.”

And then she was gone.

Princess Jane was gone. Forever, Favor knew.

Forever.

When Sam Evans came through the door, Favor was in the kitchen helping himself to more Jack Daniels.

“Hey, man,” Evans said, sounding pissed. “That’s my booze.”

“This is for you,” Favor said, and slapped a ten spot down on the counter. Favor knew he should be heading out but right now he didn’t want to go anywhere. He just wanted to stay right here and get wasted.

“She’s a looker.”

“She sure is that,” Favor said. “She sure is.”

“But her tits aren’t big enough.”

“Don’t talk about her that way. And I mean it.”

Evans was smart enough to look scared. Favor had suddenly turned dangerous again.

“She’s a princess,” Favor said. “A princess.” He felt like crying.

“Hey, man, I just like bigger tits is all. Sorry if I offended you. Now do you mind if I get in there and have a drink from my own bottle?”

“She’s a princess,” Favor said.

“Yeah, man, you said that already.”

“A princess,” Favor said, getting out of the way so Evans could get in there and get a drink from his own bottle. “A regular goddamned princess and don’t you forget it.”