Ник Сайнт: Purrfect Santa

The woman’s dark brown eyes turned to me, and she asked, “Is this my replacement?”

They ended their embrace and Chase said, “This is Odelia Poole. She’s a reporter and civilian consultant. Odelia, meet Sally Borrell. My partner back when I was with the NYPD.”

“A reporter, huh? I seem to remember you hated reporters. Called them scum of the earth.”

“Not scum of the earth, exactly,” said Chase with a smile.

“Oh, no, that’s right. You called them spume. That dirty foamy stuff that floats on top of the waves. The stuff that makes you afraid to go into the water and get all dirty and yucky.”

“Yeah, I might have been talking about a different kind of reporter,” Chase said. “The kind that works for one of the tabloids, not the Hampton Cove Gazette, which is a reputable paper.”

“So you’re the exception to the rule, huh?” asked Sally, folding her arms across her chest. “The small-town reporter who managed to turn Chase Kingsley’s head.”

“For your information,” I said, also crossing my arms, “I didn’t turn anyone’s head.”

“Yeah, she’s not the reason I got canned, Sally,” said Chase. “The opposite, actually. Odelia got that bogus charge against me dropped. If not for her, I would have been suspended from Hampton Cove PD as well, and might now be working private security in Poughkeepsie or something.”

“Huh. Is that a fact?”

Sally narrowed her eyes at me, so I did the same to her. And we would have stood there indefinitely, scowling at each other for no good reason other than that the woman seemed to have developed an instant dislike to me and me to her, if Chase hadn’t gotten between us and said, “Look, I’m looking for my grandpa. He’s gone missing and I could use some help finding him.”

Sally, after giving me one final disdainful look, finally relented. “So you want to file a missing person report?”

“I think that might be best. After you went round to his apartment, I did the same thing.”

Sally sat down and directed a worried look at Chase. “And?”

“Nothing. A neighbor said he saw Grandpa engaged in a verbal altercation with some guy, and that’s the last he ever saw of him.”

I studied Sally. So she was Chase’s former partner. She was obviously very protective of him. And as Chase supplied her with all the information about his grandfather, I glanced around. And that’s when I noticed that all eyes in the room were fixed on the three of us. The minor squabble between me and Sally had apparently been a lot louder and had attracted a lot more attention than I thought. The moment I looked around, they all looked away, and the hush that had descended upon the station was lifted as conversations resumed and the hum of activity returned in full force.

Finally, Sally had entered everything into the computer and she turned to me. “Look, I’m sorry, all right? I guess I got a little carried away just now.”

“That’s all right,” I said. “You guys must miss Chase a lot. He’s a great detective.”

“Yeah, we do miss him a lot. It just wasn’t fair the way he was set up like that. The Commissioner and the Mayor conspiring against him—it was a terrible thing they did.”

“Wait, you knew about that?” asked Chase, surprised.

“Sure. Who didn’t? Word gets around, especially since the Commissioner and Mayor Putin’s wife ended their affair and the Putins are getting a divorce. It’s all out in the open now, Chase.”

Chase had had the misfortune of walking in on Commissioner Montague and Malka Putin, prompting them to fabricate a complaint that got him suspended. Everything had been settled, and Chase had even been offered his old job back, but he’d decided he liked Hampton Cove a lot better than New York City. A lot less hassle. At least that was what he’d told the Commissioner.

“You could always come back, you know? We need you here, Kingsley.”

Chase smiled. “I’m fine with Hampton Cove. The atmosphere, the people, the peace and quiet. It just feels right, you know. Somehow this whole affair has been a blessing in disguise for me.”

Sally cast a dark look at me. “The people, huh? We’ve got people here in New York, too, you know. A lot of great people—people who appreciate you plenty.”

I rolled my eyes. This woman was just too much.

“Thanks, Sally,” said Chase, pressing her hand warmly. “But I feel like I’m just where I’m supposed to be.”

“Great,” she said acerbically. “I hope she’ll make you happy.”

“Who?” he asked, confused.

“Miss Spume here! Who else?”

“Hey!” I called out. “You take that back.”

“I’m not taking anything back! You deprived this department of a great detective.”

“I did no such thing!”

“You’re the reason he’s out there in the middle of nowhere, protecting rich fat cats from other rich fat cats! While he should be right here, helping us solve real murders of real people.”

“He is solving real murders of real people.”

“Admit it, honey. He’s just a glorified bodyguard these days.”

“I’m not a glorified bodyguard, Sally,” said Chase with a laugh.

She turned on him. “Yes, you are. Don’t think I haven’t followed your career. The only crime you’ve got out there are a bunch of celebrities getting whacked.” She threw up her arms. “Who cares about celebrities being whacked? Nobody!”

“They’re also people,” Chase said.

“Yeah, celebrities are also people,” I added. “And for your information, we don’t just have celebrities out in Hampton Cove. We have regular people too. People who deserve good police work.”

“Oh, you’re just too much,” said Sally, sitting down again.

“Sally, I…” Chase began.

“Go away, Kingsley. You and Miss Spume deserve each other. In fact you’re made for each other, anyone can see that.”

“We’re not even a couple!” I cried.

“We’re not?” asked Chase, confused. “I thought we were.”

I glanced up at him. “We are?”

“Of course we are. You’re my girlfriend. I’m your boyfriend. We’re a couple.”

“Well, if you put it that way…”

“Can you just go away?” asked Sally. “You make me sick, the both of you.”

“It’s just that, we go on dates, and we kiss and stuff, but you never said anything about us being a couple,” I told Chase, ignoring Sally.

“I thought that was a given,” said Chase. “Since we do go out on dates, and we do kiss a lot. And that’s exactly what couples do, right?”

“I guess so.”

“Get out of here!” Sally cried. “Go back to Hampton Cove to date and kiss!”

“I think we’ll do just that,” I said, lifting my chin.

“But first we have to find my grandfather,” said Chase.

“And my Santa,” I added.

“Right.”

“Out of my sight!” Sally yelled. “Get out.”

So that’s what we did. Stared after by the entire precinct. Then, as we walked out the door, they all cheered. Looks like they didn’t agree with Sally, and did not consider me spume. Besides, spume wasn’t always dirty. Spume could be nice and fluffy and pink, just like me. Maybe I was going to adopt this name and wear it proudly from now on. Odelia ‘Spume’ Poole. It had a nice ring to it. Or Odelia ‘Spume’ Kingsley. An even nicer ring.

Chapter 9

After some calling around, I finally managed to find out the name of a former manager at Thornton Fifth Avenue. If anyone knew the identity of Hampton Cove’s new Santa, it would be him. We caught up with the guy at Fun ’n Frolic, a modest toy store located on Amsterdam Avenue. Just like at Thornton’s, a Santa sat entertaining a bunch of kids. But the setup was a lot less exuberant than at Thornton’s, and Santa looked like an out-of-work actor making a dime, which he probably was.