Ник Сайнт - Purrfect Alibi

“Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy,” he said, rubbing his tummy. “You really are my brother, aren’t you? And if you’re not, you must be Santa Claus and Christmas came early this year!”

Odelia was convening with her uncle and Chase in Alec’s office. This was business as usual for them. The only difference was that this time Gran had joined them and was now lecturing her son on how to do his job.

“Didn’t I tell you to go home, Ma?” asked Uncle Alec wearily, rubbing his eyes with the palms of his hands.

“You can’t keep a good sleuth down,” Gran insisted with a wink in Odelia’s direction.

“Oh, boy,” Chase muttered, earning himself a scowl from the old lady.

“I think he did it,” she said. “He’s got that guilty look.”

“I hate to agree with you, but I think for once you’re right,” said the Chief.

“For once? I’m always right,” said Gran.

Alec ignored her. “This guy has a rap sheet as long as my arm. He’s been arrested for stealing so many times it’s a miracle he’s still walking around a free man.”

“It’s a disease,” said Chase with a lopsided grin. “And as we all know prison doesn’t cure a man, only the attention of a fine medical man like Dr. Freggar does.”

“He probably made that up,” said Odelia. “I’ll bet this Dr. Freggar doesn’t exist.”

“Oh, he exists,” said Alec. “But that doesn’t mean our Mr. Drood isn’t a thief.”

“But is he also a murderer,” said Chase, rubbing his chin. “That’s the question.”

“I told you already,” said Gran. “He’s our guy! He did it! Now fry him in the chair!”

“It doesn’t work like that, Ma,” said Uncle Alec. “We just collect the evidence and collar the guy, then it’s up to the DA to decide if they’re going to prosecute or let him walk.”

“At the very least he’ll be charged with grand larceny,” said Chase.

“Let’s not get ahead of ourselves here,” said Alec. “I think we have a pretty good case that Sasha Drood is our killer and that’s what I’ll tell the prosecutor in the morning.” He yawned cavernously. “And now I’d like to go home and get some sleep myself.”

“I think we can all use some sleep,” said Odelia, also yawning.

She glanced up and saw that Gran was still sitting, ramrod straight, staring at Uncle Alec, not a sign of tiredness on her lined face. Even her curly perm was still perfectly in place, not a white curl ruffled. “So when are you going to string him up?” she asked.

“Ma! We don’t string people up! This isn’t the Old West. People have rights.”

“This is a dangerous criminal we’re talking about, Alec. He killed once and he’ll kill again unless you remove him from society and give him the punishment he deserves.”

“Great,” Alec moaned. “My mother has turned into Dirty Harry.”

“At least Dirty Harry had the balls to do what was right.”

“Dirty Harry was a loose cannon, Ma. And he didn’t exist,” he added when Chase crooked an eyebrow at him.

“I liked his approach,” Gran insisted. “Him and Charles Bronson. They knew what they were doing. Nowadays cops are too soft. Letting gangsters like this Drood fella walk.”

“I’m not letting him walk!”

“You’re gonna.”

Odelia, who’d been following the conversation with half an ear, suddenly thought she was seeing things. On the windowsill an orange cat had just jumped up who looked a lot like Max. Then, as she watched, a second cat joined him, also orange and Max’s spitting image. But it was only when a third cat joined the fray that she realized she wasn’t dreaming, but that Max and Dooley were actually right there, and so was Max’s twin.

Max was gesturing with his paw, opening his mouth and saying stuff she couldn’t hear. It was obvious he wanted her to open the window and let them in. Problem was, Chase was sitting right next to the window, and he’d probably think it weird that she suddenly allowed three cats into Uncle Alec’s office.

Alec had noticed the cats, too, for he frowned at them, then seemed to come to the same conclusion Odelia had reached. He had no qualms about Chase thinking whatever he was going to think, though, for he said, “Chase. Open that window, will ya?”

Only now did Chase notice the three cats. If he was surprised, he didn’t show it. Being around Odelia he probably had gotten used to seeing cats wherever he went.

“Odelia,” said Max the moment the window opened, “this guy here saw the killer!”

Odelia couldn’t very well start talking feline in front of Chase, so she merely smiled when Max hopped down from the window and stalked over to her, rubbing himself against her leg. “His name is Big Mac. Don’t ask. It’s a long story. Literally. Anyway, I told him to come down here to look at some mugshots for you guys. And I promised he could get all the pizza he wanted if he did. That all right with you? He likes barbecue chicken pizza.”

Odelia thought for a moment. How was she going to handle this?

Gran, who was sitting right next to her, suddenly piped up, “Alec. Could you be a doll and order me some barbecue chicken pizza? I’m having one of them midnight cravings.”

Alec suppressed a smile. He knew the drill. “Chase, buddy? Do you mind?”

“On it,” said Chase, being a real trooper. He took out his phone.

“Could you go and get it yourself, though?” said Alec, exchanging a quick glance with Odelia.

Chase laughed. “You’re kidding, right? Domino’s delivers, dude.”

“I don’t like Domino’s,” said Gran, and Chase’s smile vanished.

“Yeah, she doesn’t like Domino’s,” Uncle Alec echoed. “She likes…”

“Giovannini’s,” said Gran promptly. “And Giovannini’s doesn’t do home delivery.”

Chase looked like he was going to say something, but one look at Gran’s implacable face taught him otherwise. He got up. “Just the pizza, Mrs. Muffin?” he asked.

“And a Diet Coke,” Gran nodded.

“If you’re going all out I wouldn’t mind some buffalo wings,” said Big Mac.

“And buffalo wings,” Gran added.

“And some creamy ranch chicken wings,” said Big Mac.

“And some creamy ranch chicken wings,” said Gran.

There was a momentary silence while Chase processed this. “That’s it?” he asked.

Gran looked at Max.

Max looked at Big Mac.

Big Mac shook his head.

Max shook his head.

Gran said, “That’s it, buckaroo. Off you go. Chop, chop.”

When I was sure I had everyone’s attention, I launched into my explanation on how we met Big Mac and what contribution this new best friend of ours could make to the investigation. Odelia listened with rapt attention and so did Gran. Even Uncle Alec seemed to hang on my every word—even though he probably didn’t understand a thing I said.

When finally I was done, Odelia looked properly impressed.

“Great work, Max. So you really saw someone enter the library, Big Mac?”

Big Mac nodded. “Yes, I did, Miss Poole. In fact I saw several people enter that library.”

Odelia relayed this information to her uncle, who was even more impressed than Odelia and her grandmother. Not for the first time the cats had saved the day. I hoped.

“So how are we going to do this?” the Chief asked, rubbing those sideburns again. “I mean, your cat buddy claims he saw several people enter the premises. Can he describe them?”

“I was hoping he could look at some mugshots,” I said. “Isn’t that how it’s done?”

“Before we can have Big Mac look at mugshots we need to have some idea about who he saw,” said Odelia. “Otherwise we’ll be here all night.”