Ник Сайнт - Purrfect Sidekick. Purrfect Deseit. Purrfect Ruse [calibre 5.14.0]

“Always fun to spend some time together,” said Suppo. “And the beaches are amazing, of course, even this late in the season.”

“You do know what happened to your cousin, right?” Sarah asked.

“Yeah—yeah, we know,” said Wim, making a face.

“So do you think Bob was abducted by the same people who knocked us out and abducted Lord Hilbourne?” asked Suppo, as he cut a quick glance to his cousin.

“It’s entirely possible,” Sarah conceded. “You’d never seen these two men before? Johnny Carew and Jerry Vale?”

“No. No, I’d never seen them before in my life,” said Suppo. “You, Wim?”

“No, I’d never seen them before either. They asked us to change rooms yesterday, and weren’t very nice about it, I thought.”

“Wait, they asked you to change rooms?”

“Yeah, they were in here yesterday. The big one claimed he suffered from vertigo, and wanted to change rooms as this one doesn’t have a balcony and theirs does. We said no, of course.”

“We told them to ask the receptionist for a different room if they weren’t happy with theirs,” said Suppo.

“And then what did they say?” said Sarah, scribbling furiously in her little notebook.

“Nothing. They left and we didn’t see them again. Until they broke the door down and locked us in the closet,” said Wim ruefully.

“Maybe we should have changed rooms after all,” his cousin added.

“In hindsight they probably just wanted to be closer to Lord Hilbourne’s room,” said Wim, “so they didn’t have to go to the trouble of dealing with the two of us.”

“That still doesn’t explain why they took my laptop,” said Suppo, apparently more annoyed at the loss of his laptop than the abduction of Lord Hilbourne.

“Thank you,” said Sarah. “If you could come down to the station tomorrow morning, you can make a formal statement if that’s all right.”

“Of course,” said Suppo, nodding.

“Happy to help you catch these guys,” his cousin said, then added, “Though if they’re the same ones that killed Bob, like I overheard one of your colleagues say just now, I’m afraid Lord Hilbourne doesn’t stand a chance.”

Chapter 31

Johnny dangled the watch in front of his face. It was a nice watch, and he was sure it would fetch them a nice sum when sold to the right fence.

“What do you reckon this is worth, Jer?” he asked.

“I have no idea, and I wish you hadn’t taken it,” said Jerry, a little peevishly.

“Yeah, but it looks so nice, and I’ve always wanted a watch like this,” said the big guy.

Jerry eyed his partner in crime with a touch of pique. “And why did you have to take that laptop? Don’t you know that laptops can be traced? In fact now that I think about it, we better dump the thing.”

“No!” said Johnny. “It’s a very special laptop, Jer.” And it was. In fact he’d never seen one like it. It was ultra-thin and sleek and looked like it was worth a big chunk of dough.

“Well, you won’t be able to use it. The moment you turn that thing on the owners will know where it is and they’ll send in the cavalry.”

They were in their rented little Fiat, on their way to the safe house they’d chosen for the occasion, even though Jerry wasn’t entirely sure how safe this house really was. Still, it was better than having to move around and risk being detected by one of the cops’ flying squads, which presumably by now would have set up roadblocks all around town and be on the lookout for them and the precious cargo they were carrying.

“If you want you can have the watch, Jer,” said Johnny magnanimously.

“I don’t want it! It probably belongs to Little Lord Fauntleroy over there.” He jerked his thumb to the backseat, where an unconscious ‘Little Lord Fauntleroy’ quietly lay slumped.

“I didn’t know his name was Fauntleroy,” said Johnny, surprised. “I thought his name was Hilbourne.”

“Just kidding,” said Jerry with a grimace. Since he rarely kidded, it was usually a little hard for people to figure out that that was, in fact, what he was doing. “We gotta take stock and regroup,” he announced. “And to do that we need to lay low for a while. Are you sure she’ll be as happy to see us as you think?”

“Oh, sure, Jer. You know that woman cares about us. I could see it in her eyes the first time we met, way back when.”

“Way back when is right,” Jerry grunted, and steered their little vehicle into the night, eager to get where they were going… fast.

Marge had been lying awake. She’d tossed and turned but frustratingly sleep wouldn’t come. With a tired groan she shifted from her belly to her side and in the process poked her better half in the stomach with her elbow. Tex made an oophing sound and jerked upright. “You have perfectly nice legs, Mrs. Baumgartner!” he blurted out, then, dazed, glanced around, trying to get his bearings. “Oh, hey, honey,” he said.

“What’s all this about Ida Baumgartner’s legs?” Marge asked suspiciously.

“I was dreaming of Ida,” he said, idly groping for the wispy remnants of his recent dream—or nightmare—even as they evaporated like breath on a razor blade. “She asked me if her legs weren’t too thick and wanted me to prescribe her something to make them thinner.” He shivered. “As if it isn’t enough to have to deal with that woman on a daily basis now she’s haunting my nights as well.”

“We have to talk, Tex,” Marge announced.

Tex immediately looked stricken. “I told you, honey, I don’t have feelings for Evelina. I only did it as a kindness to a dying woman.”

“She isn’t dying, Tex.”

“Almost dying,” he muttered.

“Let’s not get into all that again,” said Marge. “We need to talk about Odelia.”

“Odelia?”

“Your daughter has got herself in quite a fix,” said Marge. “Well, to be entirely honest, I helped her get into that fix, and so did my mother.”

“Of course she did,” said Tex, who’d never been a big fan of his mother-in-law. Though after successfully pleading his case his view of the woman had considerably softened.

“A hundred more people RSVPed, most of whom were never invited in the first place, and if Odelia and my mom got the same number, and I’m sure they have, we’re looking at over a thousand guests for the wedding.”

“A thousand!”

“And if this keeps up—and I think it will—we’ll be looking at two or three thousand by Saturday. We can’t afford to throw a wedding for two or three thousand people. It’s going to empty our savings account and my mom’s and Odelia’s, too. We’ll all be ruined.”

“Can’t you do something? Maybe limit the number of guests?”

“And tell all those people they’re suddenly uninvited?”

“You could stop accepting new people.”

“A thousand is still too much, Tex. Way too much.”

“I know,” he said musingly. “So what do you suggest?”

“I suggest we hold a family meeting and thresh this thing out once and for all.”

“Right,” said Tex as he fluffed up his pillow and prepared to go back to sleep. Though presumably this time without Ida Baumgartner’s legs haunting his dreams.

But unfortunately for Tex sleep would have to be postponed, for just at that moment the front doorbell rang out and he groaned.

“You’ve got to be kidding! I’ll bet it’s Ida—my dream must have been a premonition!”

“If she complains about her legs tell her to take a hike. Hiking is a great exercise for the legs, and very slimming, too.”

So Tex extricated himself from his comfortable position in the warm bed and reluctantly slipped his feet into his slippers and put on his robe. By the time he was stomping down the stairs he was muttering unpleasant oaths under his breath.