Patricia Wentworth - Mr. Zero

The little man came over from his window. Superintendent Boyce looked down upon the top of a sandy head which barely reached his shoulder.

“Now,” said Colonel Anstruther, “if you will each put out a hand, Lady Colesborough will be able to see what I mean.”

Sylvia gazed earnestly, first at the tall, good-looking Inspector, and then at Mr. Brook, that least noticeable of men. She said in a horrified voice,

“Do you mean that one of them is Mr. Zero?”

Inspector Boyce very nearly disgraced himself. His face stiffened and assumed strange tints. Mr. Brook remained unmoved. Colonel Anstruther said in the tone of a man who prays for patience without a great deal of hope that his prayer will be granted,

“Certainly not. I wish you to observe the difference in the height at which they are extending their hands. I want to know whether this suggests anything. Cast your mind back to the drive at Wellings. You gave that envelope to a man who put out his hand to receive it. Look at the Inspector, look at Mr. Brook. Try and remember whether Mr. Zero’s hand was as high as the Inspector’s or as low as Mr. Brook’s.”

Sylvia looked, and said, “I don’t know. But I’m sure he was tall.”

“Why?”

“Because he was-I mean, I always thought of him that way-at least I don’t know-I did then, but not afterwards.”

“Excuse me, Colonel Anstruther-” said Mr. Brook.

Colonel Anstruther nodded a “That’ll do, Boyce,” and the Inspector went back to his notes.

Mr. Brook brought up a small hard chair and sat down.

“Now, Lady Colesborough,” he said in a soft, pleasant voice, “I want just to ask you one or two questions.”

“I’m so tired of them,” said Sylvia.

“I’m sure you are, but I just wondered what you meant when you said that at first you thought Mr. Zero was tall but not afterwards.”

Sylvia looked blank.

“I don’t know-I just thought he was.”

“You thought he was tall, and then you didn’t think so?”

She brightened a little and said, “Yes.”

“What happened to alter your impression? I mean, why did you think he was tall at first, and then stop thinking so?”

“Oh, but I didn’t,” said Sylvia a little breathlessly.

Mr. Brook was of an admirable patience. He said,

“Will you try and tell me what you mean? It’s very interesting, you know.”

She smiled and relaxed. It was nice to feel interesting. She liked him much better than the old man with the red face. She really tried to remember.

“When he rang me up-you know, just before we went to Wellings-I thought-well, I thought it was wonderful of him to help me, because I was feeling as if I should die if Francis found out what a lot of money I’d lost, and it was all on the telephone, and I didn’t notice about his being tall or anything like that, but when I gave him the envelope in the drive at Wellings he-somehow he frightened me, if you know what I mean.”

“Yes, I know,” said Mr. Brook in his sympathetic voice. “Please go on, Lady Colesborough.”

“I was dreadfully frightened,” said Sylvia with a catch in her voice. “I ran all the way back to the house. That was the time I was sure he was tall. You know how it is-there’s a sort of up in the air kind of feeling about the way they talk.”

Mr. Brook smiled encouragingly.

“I know exactly what you mean. You would have that feeling about the Inspector perhaps, but you wouldn’t have it about me.”

Sylvia looked pleased. She liked Mr. Brook. The cross old man kept pretending not to understand what she meant, but Mr. Brook knew at once. He had a nice soft voice too.

He said, “Then that was the first time you were actually in contact with Mr. Zero, and you got an impression that he was tall?”

Sylvia’s lovely eyes widened.

“Oh, no,” she said.

“But, Lady Colesborough-”

“It wasn’t the first time.”

“Well, just for the moment I thought we would leave out the telephone conversation you had with him. I suppose that was really the first contact?”

The word puzzled Sylvia, but she said “Oh, no” in quite a heartfelt way.

Colonel Anstruther’s reaction was, “Well, he’s getting it now. I wish him joy of her in the witness-box.”

Mr. Brook showed no sign of disturbance. He said gently,

“Tell me about the first time, will you?”

The little line which meant that Sylvia was puzzled showed for a moment just between her eyes.

“Do you mean the first time he telephoned?”

“The first time he did anything,” said Mr. Brook firmly.

“Oh, that was on a Friday, because I’d just been having my hair done-shampoo and set, you know.”

“You remember it by that?”

“I always remember about my hair,” said Sylvia in a reverential tone. “And he rang up and said he was so sorry-about my losing all that money, you know-and if I would meet him, he was quite sure something could be arranged.”

“Did he say how he came to know you had lost this money?”

“Lots of people knew, but they wouldn’t have told. It was at a party I went to with Poppy. I didn’t know most of them.”

“I see,” said Mr. Brook. “Let us get back to Mr. Zero. He asked you to meet him. And did you?”

“Oh, yes, I did. We were coming down here, and he said if I met him just after twelve o’clock by the window in the yew walk-”

“Then last night was not the first time you had met him there?”

“Oh, no, it wasn’t. And he said would I like to earn some money-”

“One moment, Lady Colesborough-when did he say this?”

Sylvia looked surprised.

“When I met him.”

“I see. And that was down here at Cole Lester at midnight on Friday the twenty-ninth of January?”

“I suppose it was. He said such a lot of things, and it’s so difficult to remember.”

Mr. Brook’s voice was very persuasive.

“Try and remember just what happened when you met him-what he said-what impression he made on you.”

“He said he wanted to help me, and he said would I like to earn a lot of money, and I said I would. And he said I could quite easily, and then he told me how.”

“He knew you were going to Wellings?”

“Oh, yes.”

“Did he mention Mr. Lushington at that time?”

“I don’t know. I suppose he did. Oh, yes, I know he did, because he seemed to think I ought to know about his being something in the Government.”

“You didn’t know Mr. Lushington was Home Secretary?”

“I can’t remember that sort of thing,” said Sylvia in a helpless voice.

Mr. Brook smiled at her.

“It’s dull-isn’t it? Now, Lady Colesborough, I’m not going to bother you any more, but I would just like to know what impression you got about Mr. Zero the first time you met him by the window in the yew hedge.”

“He was outside, and I was in-I didn’t see him at all.”

“He was outside, and you were in all the time, just as you were last night. Well now, how did he seem-all tall, and up in the air?”

“Oh, no, he didn’t. I wasn’t a bit frightened of him then.”

“Thank you, Lady Colesborough. I don’t think we need keep you now. I suppose your husband never mentioned Mr. Zero to you, did he?”

Sylvia, glad to be gone, was already out of her chair. She said with unmistakable truthfulness,

“Oh, no . He didn’t know anything about him. That was the only reason I did it-so that Francis shouldn’t know.”

When the door had closed behind Sylvia Colonel Anstruther allowed his pent-up feelings to escape him.

“The woman’s a half-wit!” he boomed. “I don’t know what you thought you were getting out of her, Mr. Brook. She can remember about her hair, but she can’t remember when she made up her mind to steal papers from the Home Secretary. She can’t put two sentences together without contradicting herself, and she can’t give a rational answer to save her life.”