Vikas Swarup - Six Suspects

'Good work, Tripurari. But we are still one short.'

'I know, Bhaiyyaji. I have tried everything and I am convinced that there isn't a single MLA left in the party now who can be broken. We are still racking our brains, but that one MLA is proving as elusive as Osama Bin Laden. What should we do now, Bhaiyyaji?'

(Pause.)

'Do you know, Tripurari, the difference between a leader and a follower?'

'What is it, Bhaiyyaji?'

'A follower just sticks to the path created by the leader. But a leader creates a new path. The problem with you is that you only see straight. You cannot see round a bend. I see round the next three bends. Tell me, who was the MLA who invited us to Clarks Awadh Hotel last year for his son's birthday party – who was turning three, if I remember correctly.'

'It was a long time ago, Bhaiyyaji. Let me see. It was January last year… Yes, I remember now, it was Gopal Mani Tripathi, wasn't it?'

'Yes. That's right. Gopal Mani is the legislator from Bareilly, I think. Did you speak to him?'

'What are you saying, Bhaiyyaji? That fellow is solidly behind the Chief Minister. There are rumours that he might become Forest Minister. How can we even think that he will agree to defect?'

'The love for a son can often be a great motivating factor. (Pause.) Anything entering your obtuse brain, Tripurari, or do I have to spell it out?'

(Pause.)

'Say no more, Bhaiyyaji. I indeed have a lot to learn from you. Should I ask Mukhtar?'

'Yes, tell him to get cracking. Then you will have your eleven.'

'I am calling from Allahabad. Guruji wants to speak to Home Minister Jagannath Rai.'

'Oh, Guruji himself? I will put him through immediately to Bhaiyyaji.'

Beep. Beep. Beep.

'Is that really you, Guruji?'

'Jagannath, I am in a great deal of trouble. I need your help.'

'What happened, Guruji? I was really worried for your safety when I heard about that bomb blast. These terrorists have not even spared the Magh Mela! But Tripurari confirmed to me that you were unhurt.'

'Yes, Jagannath, by the grace of God, the bomb blast did not cause me any harm. But today there has been a raid at my ashram in Mathura. The Health Department is claiming that the herbal remedies I have been giving my devotees contain human and animal bones.'

'How is that possible, Guruji? This must be a ploy by the multinational drug companies to malign you.'

'That is exactly what I think, Jagannath. But my troubles don't end there. Three women who claim to be my devotees, whom I have never met in my life, have filed complaints that I have sexually molested them. You know that I am an ascetic and have taken the vow of brahmacharya. I cannot even think of doing such an immoral act. Yet your police have issued a warrant and are going to arrest me. I am still in Allahabad and in hiding at a disciple's house. What should I do?'

'It looks to me as if there is a very big conspiracy at work against you, Guruji.'

'I think a rival akhara is behind this and my suspicion lies with that swine Swami Brahmdeo, who, you know, is close to the Chief Minister. It must be his doing. Now only you can get me out of this jam.'

'Unfortunately, Guruji, even I no longer have the power to prevent your arrest, as I am no longer the Home Minister. But I can facilitate your escape.'

'Escape?'

'Yes. You must run away to America or Europe immediately, otherwise they will put you in prison for ten to fifteen months. Sexual-molestation charges are taken very seriously because of all the NGOs which have sprouted up in the State.'

'Is that so? Then I must move immediately.'

'I will ask one of my men to contact you within the hour with a getaway vehicle. It will take you to the Nepal border. From there you can go to Kathmandu and catch a flight to wherever you have a visa for.'

'Thank you, Jagannath. I shall remember this favour. Can I ask for one more?'

'Of course, Guruji.'

'My most sacred possession was an ancient shivling gifted to me by a devotee from Tamil Nadu. Two days ago, taking advantage of the pandemonium which ensued after the terrorist attack, a thief stole it from my akhara, where it was on display. That is why all these troubles have descended upon me. It is imperative that I recover the shivling. You told me that the Director General of Police is your trusted man. Will you please ask him to do a proper investigation and try and recover it from the culprit? It might still be in Allahabad. Once it is recovered, he can leave it with you for safe-keeping till I return. Will you do this for me?'

'I would do it gladly, Guruji, but perhaps you don't know that the day I was removed as Home Minister, the Chief Minister also suspended Maurya. I have no influence over the police any longer.'

'Arrey, this is very bad. But don't you worry, Lord Shiva will set everything right. Mark my word, this Chief Minister's days are numbered.'

'I hope your prophecy comes true.'

'OK, Jagannath, I shall wait for your man to contact me. Jai Shambhu.'

'Jai Shambhu, Guruji.'

'Bhaiyyaji, I have good news and bad news.'

'Give me the good news first, Tripurari.'

'The good news is that we have all the MLAs we need to break the party and form our own party.'

'Excellent. Shift them immediately to our guesthouse in Badaun and put them under house arrest. Take away their mobile phones. No one must be allowed to contact them. We will trot them out only when the Governor invites me to parade the MLAs in his residence.'

'I have already done that, Bhaiyyaji. A bus has taken them to Badaun. I have also put a minder with them.'

'Then what is the bad news?'

'Tiwariji has conveyed that the Opposition parties have decided not to support your bid for Chief Ministership.'

'What? I spoke to all of them. They did not express any reservations to me. Tiwari himself praised my decision.'

'It has nothing to do with you, Bhaiyyaji. It has to do with Vicky.'

'What do you mean?'

'All this publicity on TV and the daily reports in the media about Vicky's acquittal… the public is getting agitated. As a result, the legislators are getting cold feet. They think that if they support your bid to become Chief Minister they might get tainted too.'

'Arrey, each of these bastards is already fully painted with corruption. How much more tainted can they get?'

'I know, Bhaiyyaji, but this is not just an excuse. They really think you should cool it for a while, disappear from the public view, let this whole case die down. Tiwari says he will support your reinstatement as Home Minister, but not your becoming Chief Minister at this juncture. Some of the Independents I spoke to also share this view. Vicky has become your biggest liability.'

'So what do we do now?'

'Tiwari says he will go as your emissary to the Chief Minister. He will help hammer out a compromise. In return he has asked for one crore.'

'This is ridiculous. Why should I pay him to get back a position which is rightfully mine? After all, I have not been convicted.'

'Bhaiyyaji, sometimes the sins of the son are visited on the father. Without the Home Ministership we will become vulnerable. And the Chief Minister can always tell the police to start needling us. Now we don't even have the protection of the Director General of Police. I say we should accept Tiwari's offer.'

'OK, but tell him the pay-off will take some time.'

'That is fine, Bhaiyyaji. Your word is good enough.'

'Jaaneman, are you still in Delhi?'

'Yes. It is such a refreshing change from Lucknow. Compared to the vibrant life in this city, Lucknow is like a cemetery.'

'Don't say that, Seema. After all, I am here. I am missing you terribly. Even Guruji has gone away to some place called Featherland.'