Balázs Pataki - S.T.A.L.K.E.R. - Northern Passage

“I don’t want to talk about it.”

“Your choice, tsiganka .”

For a few minutes they sit in silence. Nooria tries to understand if Larissa’s casual words were referring to the murder eventually depending on her decision only, or were just meant to leave her secret alone. She wishes to share the mental burden weighing down on her but her caution prevails.

“Your jewelry is nice,” she says looking at Larissa’s earring. It forms a silver butterfly with two tiny, red gems where its eyes would be.

“You are very kind. Men like it too. You want some?”

“Men?”

“Anasha.”

“No.”

“And men?”

“Only mine.”

“Yes, I feel like that too.” The blonde chuckles. “I always keep thinking of him. I do everything that’s normal but for no money in the world would I look into their eyes. Or kiss them. That’s off limits. I keep my eyes closed and think of my boyfriend—and God save me from thinking of certain guests when I’ll be with him again!” Larissa chuckles again and narrows her brown eyes like a cat.

“Where is he?”

“He still studies.”

“Does he know?”

“Are you out of your mind?”

“Sorry. Are you here like Lili? I mean, are you here for—”

“No, no!” Larissa shudders with overplayed disgust. “To me it’s just for the money. Good money.”

“How much money do you need?”

“Don’t play Mother Teresa on me, okay? I feel all right where I am. At least for the time being.”

“I don’t understand. Sultan makes you do things you don’t want—not decent things. Not honorable things.”

“You are very mistaken if you think Sultan has no honor, and even more so if you think I have no honor. Do for one day what I do and you will understand that your body is an asset like… oh never mind. My soul is not into it, most of the time, anyway.“ She shrugs. ”I’m just helping them. Sometimes it’s like being a doctor, I tell you that.”

Nooria doesn’t know what to reply. Secretly, she had hoped that if she gives her word to someone who is after all just a criminal and as such a man without honor in her eyes, it would be as if she wouldn’t have given it at all. She could forget about it, after a little struggle with her better conscience. What Larissa has just said disturbs her view of Sultan profoundly, and Larissa hasn’t even finished.

“Those guys have their own idea of honor. You can call them a bunch of jerks locked in a perpetual dick measuring contest but they do keep their promises, be it good or bad. Like Sultan. He respects us, in his own way. The problem is—give me a sip, Margarita.” With a few deep gulps of vodka apparently boosting her courage, Larissa cuddles closer to Nooria and continues in a lower voice. “He keeps my money safe—but from me also. So, thing is he always keeps telling me how much the Jacuzzi, hot water, electricity and all that shit costs and deducts it from what I earn. I still don’t have enough collected.”

“How much would you need?” Nooria asks.

Larissa puts her head on Nooria’s shoulder.

“Not too much, I guess… enough for an apartment that I choose, with furniture that I like, with all kinds of stuff that makes me feel comfortable. So that I could be standing on my own feet, you understand?”

“But you speak English. You must have good education. Why this?”

“Are you kidding me? Do you know how much I would earn as an office assistant? I still would have to suck cock if I wanted a better salary.”

Larissa makes a sad face but then bursts out in laughter. Nooria laughs with her. She pulls the blanket tighter and sits closer to Larissa. As she moves, she feels something soft pressing against her bum. Taking it, she realizes it’s a teddy bear.

“That’s Misha,“ Larissa says taking the toy. “He is the best man in the world. He has been my friend since I was a little girl.” Larissa takes the bear and holds it tight to her breast. “Misha is the only man I go to bed with outside of business hours.” They laugh. “Here, Margarita. Try my anasha.”

“I don’t want to.”

“Please.”

“No.”

“Your loss… your loss. You want to listen to some music? I have an iPod somewhere in my cupboard. ”

“First tell me how much money you need to get out of here.”

“Look, tsiganka… you’re getting a little pushy. It’s all about me trying to be my own master, don’t you understand?”

Larissa puts the bottle to her lips, blows the smoke into the bottle and takes a swig.

“But how can you be your own master when you can’t leave from here?”

“I can. I only need to ask Knuckles or another guy staying with us for our… safety. They knew I wouldn’t run away.” Larissa drums with her fingers on the bottle. “How could I run away anyway, with them keeping my papers… But one day I will, if I have enough money. Rest assured, I’m not a slave.”

“But how much you need?”

“Oh my God! Just to shut you up, maybe… fifty thousand? Dollars, of course! You have that on you? No? I guessed so. In a good week, I earn about three hundred—with all that damned expenses that Sultan deducts, I still have to work—how long? Damn, I have a degree in sociology, not maths—”

“Do you have a knife?”

“Why?”

“Anything metallic?”

“You are really strange,” Larissa says. She gets up, opens the window and tosses the joint butt off. For a minute, she rummages in the drawer of the table.

“Here’s a knife,” she says slipping back under the blanket with a blunt kitchen knife. “Spreading butter is the only thing it’s good for.”

Now it is Nooria who gets up. She takes her blade from the chair where she had left her clothes.

“Where did you get that from?” Larissa slowly whispers when she sees the jeweled sheath.

“From my stepmother.”

Nooria begins to remove the ruby from the pommel with the blunt knife.

“Are you mad?”

Ignoring Larissa’s whisper, Nooria works on the ruby until it becomes lose. She holds it close to the candle.

“Sultan said it is worth twenty thousand,” she says, holding the jewel between her thumb and index finger close to the candle. The ruby shines and glitters with deep, blood-colored red. “Dollars, of course.”

“Oh my God,” Larissa whimpers. “That means it’s worth at least two times more than that.”

“You have been kind to me,” Nooria whispers. “Take it and go where you really want.”

“You are completely crazy!”

“Take it.”

At first Larissa refuses to open her fist but Nooria folds her fingers back with a force that leaves the blonde aghast.

“Outch! That hurts!”

“Take it and go,” Nooria says closing Larissa’s reluctant fingers into a fist again, now holding the ruby.

“It feels warm,” Larissa says.

“It is a glowing stone. An artifact. Like in the Zone.”

“The Zone? Oh my good God,” Larissa whispers, moving a little away from Nooria. “The guys who have been there are the worst… complete freaks!”

“Why?”

“Come on — they spend a long time in that irradiated hellhole, totally deprived of sex, make good money with the artifacts they smuggle out and then — guess where they spend it. They’re mad about sex! And they all fuck as if could be the last one… for some it probably is. Don’t tell me you’ve been there!”

“I—I can protect myself.”

Larissa points at the blade.

“With that?” Seeing Nooria nod, she studies her for a long minute. “Who are you, Margarita?”

“You helped me. I help you. Now find out how to escape.”

“It’s not escape but… all right… that jerk Knuckles keeps my ID card, and he keeps telling me that if I run away he will kill my mother, and she is the only… But now If I take this to the right person… are you serious? This is worth a fortune!”