William Bayer - Tangier

She did, finally, on a hot May afternoon. Monsieur de Hoag was in Geneva on a business trip. Jean had left the office early to join Claude on the courts at noon. They played hard, the heat was terrific, and afterward Claude suggested they take a drive.

It was a cloudless, windy day of violent waves on the Atlantic shore. She chose a deserted little bay between Cap Spartel and Robinson Plage. They parked on the cliffs, climbed down to the beach, and without a word started to undress. Finally, standing bare, they turned to one another and stared. There was a pause as they ached and tensed, the sort of pause, it seemed to Jean, that must always occur before a passionate event. Then she came to him, circled his waist, pressed her cheek against his shoulder. He felt her shudder as he wrapped her in his arms.

They made love in a cranny in the cliffs, searing, thrusting, violent. Then, pulled apart, they lay on their backs in the sand, chests heaving, listening to the surf. Jean wanted to speak, but all his thoughts were chaotic. He was conscious only that their act had been momentous, and that by it everything in his life was now, irrevocably, changed.

They made love again. This time she rode him. He gazed up at her, her face held high, her turquoise eyes upon the sea reflecting back the sun. She rode and rode, never looking down. Waves smashed against the sand. He felt that they were joined.

Afterward they swam, then licked the salt off each other's cheeks.

At the house that night she led him to her suite. The weeks of tennis had built up such a backlog of desire that it took them until dawn to use it up. They were savage with each other, devouring, excessive. He ravished her, again and again, and she provoked him further with demands. Finally, when they were finished, Jean felt they'd pushed to the limits of their polarity. He was proud of his manhood, and falling off to sleep he was conscious that his sense of it had been enlarged.

When Monsieur de Hoag came back and they could no longer be alone, they'd brush against each other in the villa halls. Their hands would touch fleetingly as they'd seat themselves for dinner. Over breakfast in the mornings they could hardly bear the stress.

After a few days Claude could stand it no longer. She suddenly stopped playing tennis in the middle of a match. They got into her car and drove madly down the coast. In Asilah, in a Portuguese hotel, they made love on a stained old mattress while dry thunder rumbled in the sky.

Tangier embraced them. Something tragic about the city, Jean thought, provided resonance for their affair. He thought of himself as a man living in a decaying temple; he prayed at an altar of erotic love while a storm raged outside.

Through May and June Monsieur de Hoag was constantly away, on a series of brief business trips to Zurich, Monaco, and Rome. On one of these occasions Jean and Claude were invited together to Barclay's house, a strange, irrelevant dinner, Jean thought, where Claude's father had acted like a fool. Apropos of nothing the General turned to the Governor and began complaining about his phone. Jean, embarrassed, looking around, confronted Omar Salah glaring at him with hate.

Afterward he told Claude, then asked if she thought Salah suspected their affair.

"It wasn't Salah who was watching you," she said with a scornful laugh. "It was Barclay. He couldn't tear his eyes away."

"But why?"

"He's an English pederast. Are you blind, Jean? Haven't you noticed him on the terrace of the tennis club devouring you as if you were his feast?" And then, fondling his testicles: "How Peter Barclay would love to get his hands on these!"

Joop de Hoag, she told him, only had one ball. The other, undescended, had atrophied inside. "He disgusts me," she said with a grimace. "Physically he disgusts me. I despise his body and loathe his wealth."

She kissed him a while, then suddenly turned over on her back. "I lied to you, Jean," she said. "Last year I slept with Salah. We spent a weekend together in Marrakech. Per-haps he suspects us. I don't know."

He could hardly believe it, but when he questioned her she refused to tell him any more.

"Tangier is complicated," she said. "Things here are not so simple as they seem."

Yes, there was something torturous about Tangier, a sense he had of tension and labyrinthine density all around. Was the romantic charm of this old city merely its facade? Was it an abyss into which he'd flung himself for love?

He lay awake that night listening to the distant cries of the muezzin, thinking about women and deceit. He was twenty-three; Claude was thirty-five. Together their bodies sang, but there was disconnection between their minds. He'd perceived this in her before, sometimes when they were making love: a lack of focus, a concentration upon herself, her eyes, always averted, fixed on some distant point. Is it possible, he asked himself, that she and Salah are still involved? Why would he stare at me like that? Could she have told him? Is she mad?

Sometimes he thought that she was. She seemed to want to dare the world to discover them, to take chances no sane person in her position would want to take. She insisted they rent horses and gallop publicly down the Spartel beach. On a tennis ball with a pen she wrote that she loved him, then demanded he smash aces until her words were worn away.

One morning they played very early at the club, even before Monsieur de Hoag was awake. After a hard set she came with him into the men's changing room. Claiming she was excited by the danger and the smell, she insisted he make love to her on the wooden bench between the lockers. He complied because it was still early and no one else was about, but in the middle of the act he opened his eyes and saw the crippled boy who raked the courts watching them from the door. He didn't tell Claude but later he was scared. He knew that now that one Arab had learned their secret, all Tangier had learned it too.

There was something corrupting about the city, he thought, something infectious about its rot. His golden love for Claude had tarnished to a mellow rust. He was beginning to enjoy her whirlpool, her sense of treachery, her bizarre desires.

Together they went to see Inigo, to confide in him, confess their affair. The painter, flattered to be chosen as their confidant, invited them to make a tour of his house. He was charming, almost childlike, as he led them through room after room, each connected to the next by a Moorish arch, each containing a finished painting hanging from the wall by chains. In his studio he showed them an uncompleted portrait of Patrick Wax. The old man was seated before a display of crucifixes; a Pekingese, sprouting a pink erection, gazed out from beneath Wax's chair.

When they had seen everything, and had finished gasping over the perfection of his technique, Inigo led them to a little room beside his pool. "This is a steambath," he said, opening a valve. "I built it to remind myself of the many amusing people I've met in the bathhouses of New York."

Claude was delighted, clapped her hands. "Please, Inigo," she said, "let Jean make love to me here. You can watch us if you like."

For a moment Jean was stunned, then excited by her idea. How far I've come , he thought, since I dreamed of her in the fall .

Inigo released more steam, smiled, and left to fetch his crayons. They were already undressed, locked on the floor of wooden slats, when he returned and began to sketch.

Afterward they knelt beside him, naked, their bodies slick.

Peering at his drawing, they discovered themselves as vague, amorphous figures lost in mist. It was a tour de force of draftsmanship. Inigo ripped it from his sketchbook and presented it to Claude as a gift. He placed his arms around their bare shoulders, hugged them tight, then lit and passed a kif cigarette.